Edit: All photos were removed due to DMCA request.

Welcome back to another edition of “You Hypocritical Slut!” This week we feature a critically-lauded media darling straight out of Hollywood, California! Jennifer Lawrence, come on down!

Who Is Jennifer Lawrence?

For those of you who don’t know her, Jennifer Lawrence is a young American A-list actress most notable for being the lead in The Hunger Games series of movies, and for winning an Oscar for Best Actress for Silver Linings Playbook. J-Law is also a media and public darling, widely hailed as a role model for young girls in this vilely Patriarchal world of ours. Just listen to some of the love that gets thrown her way:

Jennifer understands that its not easy out there for teenage girls and actively wants to be a good role model. Speaking about getting in shape for her ‘Hunger Games’ role,  Jennifer said, ‘I’m never going to starve myself for a part, I don’t want little girls to be like, ‘Oh, I want to look like Katniss, so I’m going to skip dinner.’

Amusingly, this same article also lauds over how one of Jennifer Lawrence’s maids found a butt-plug. Pride in the body god gave her, then slavery and sluttery! What a great role model. It is amusing that J-Law’s maid found the butt-plug though, since as Marie Claire tells us:

As the cover star of the latest issue of French magazine Madame Figaro, the 23-year old actress, who is currently starring in the second installment of The Hunger Games franchise, revealed why she doesn’t want that celebrity essential: a personal assistant. [emphasis Billy’s] ‘I want my life is as normal as possible.’   Jennifer told the magazine. ‘One of the dangers in the film industry is that things are too fast. I do not want to burn the stages of my life. I want to keep it simple, I do not have an assistant.’

Instead, Jennifer says that the ‘[the person] that helps me is my best friend’ and that the two have known each other for 22 years. ‘At the end of a day of shooting, I can go home and hang out with her, and not share time with someone who works for me.’ Despite wanting to lead as normal a life as possible, Jennifer realises that she has become a role model for young women, especially since taking on the role of Katniss in The Hunger Games. ‘[It] would be hypocritical [of me] to deny that girls take me as an example, and say that I don’t have responsibility to them. Because clearly, I have. I know the influence of celebrities on young people. I was a teenager, and I want to send a positive message.’

Hypocritical you say, Jenny? Like how it would be hypocritical for someone to not want to hire one person to answer their phone and schedule their meetings, but then on the other hand hire someone else to clean up their house? Or perhaps Jennifer Lawrence just doesn’t realize that most early 20-something women don’t have maids. Maybe J-Law is just out of touch.

After all, she says she wants to send positive messages to young girls—then tells stories about butt-plugs. I guess we’ll leave it to the young girls to sifter through the messages J-Law’s trying to send. It’s not like a young girl going through the hormonal tempest of puberty in a culture which is trying to turn her into a slut (and then laugh at her for said sluttery at the same time) has anything more important on her mind than trying to figure out what the hell her idol is trying to say.

There’s just no imagination in Hollywood. I wanted to show people “Winter’s Bone” for the performance, but it ended up having the opposite effect. People were like, no, she’s not feminine, she’s not sexual.

Jennifer Lawrence, Self Proclaimed Role Model For Young Women

Regardless of her flip-flopping nature, it’s still a good thing that Jennifer Lawrence can be a role model to young girls. As she says about Katniss, the strong empowered female hero of the The Hunger Games franchise:

Speaking on the eve of the world premiere of The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, in which she stars as heroine Katniss, the actress said: “Growing up I didn’t have a female hero the way that Katniss is. I think she’s a wonderful role model for young girls. I’m happy that they have a character like that.” Admitting that she has said no to directors that have asked her to lose weight, she insists on managing unrealistic expectations and said it is more important to look strong and healthy. “We have the ability to control this image that young girls are going to be seeing,” she told Newsnight.

Jennifer Lawrence was born in 1990. I guess she made a concerted effort not to read or watch a single movie, book or television show growing up in the 1990’s, since I can name several shows off the top of my head featuring strong female leads from after 1990: [Daria 1997-2002,  Buffy The Vampire Slayer 1997 – 2003, Xena: Warrior Princess 1995 – 2001, Sailor Moon 1995 – 2000, Sabrina The Teenage Witch 1996 – 2003, The Babysitter’s Club 1986 – 2000, Sweet Valley High 1983 – 2003,  Kim Possible 2002 – 2007] And that woefully short list excludes the numerous shows, books, and movies where strong women are simply a part of a team instead of the leaders (e.g. Power Rangers, Digimon, Harry Potter, Animorphs).

I was born in 1991 and I grew up with older and younger sisters. Believe me, there were more than enough strong, empowered female role models in the media. At this point I’m tempted to say Jennifer Lawrence is talking out her ass, but that’s very unlikely since, as she has blunted stated in the past, she likes putting a plug in there.

So why is there so much love for the obviously hypocritical Jennifer Lawrence? Good PR. J-Law constantly talks about how much of a down to earth person she is, and around the time of the first Hunger Games movie, Jennifer made a big deal about being a “fat” actress in Hollywood. Since we live among the fattest generation of humans ever to have existed in history, the public ate this up. Finally! Here was an actress who didn’t starve herself! She’s just like us!


In fact, I freely admit that, when I first saw Jennifer Lawrence and Gabhorhey Cidoobey Precious, I could not tell who was who. Though both of these incredibly talented actresses are merely curvy by modern standards of fat measurement, can you tell which of these good female role models is “I’m totes fatzone” Jennifer Lawrence?

“In Hollywood, I’m obese. I’m considered a fat actress, I’m Val Kilmer in that one picture on the beach.” (Source)

Maybe there is something to that, though. Perhaps, under those form fitting clothes of her, Jennifer Lawrence is fat. Well, unless J-Law is an attention seeking whore who takes and has had naked pictures taken of her, we’ll never know will we?

Jennifer Lawrence Is Either A Liar Or Idiotic

Look at all those jelly rolls! Sarcasm aside, Jennifer Lawrence is not fat. Clearly she has never been fat, judging by her perfect non-photoshopped skin marred by not a single serious stretch mark. Oh yeah, a bunch of nude selfies and pictures taken by others have emerged after Jennifer Lawrence’s phone was hacked. Jenny-kins, whom has proclaimed herself (and been proclaimed by others) as a role model for girls and young women has taken numerous naked selfies with the numerous men she has slept with. Remember girls! You can be whoever you want to be! But if a hot guy tells you to take your clothes off so he can degrade you by taking naked pictures of you THEN YOU DO IT!

I’m excited to be seen as sexy. But not slutty.

Nothing screams sexy like a girl bending over as if she’s about to blast out two pounds of chicken wings. Men, is the above what you hope your daughters will one day be? Because in a world where Jennifer Lawrence is honestly considered a role model…

“There are actresses who build themselves, and then there are actresses who are built by others. I want to build myself.”

From the look of all her leaked nudes, J-Law’s first focus should be building a top for herself. It’s not enough. All the money, the fame, the attention she gets; Jennifer still feels the compulsion to strip down and take a naked selfie of herself in order to assuage her ego. Every modern woman is the religion of herself, and she is always in worship. Also, take note of the ‘le artiste’ smugness of that last quote. Jennifer is a serious woman doing serious things!

“Where are the Robert Redfords and Paul Newmans of my age group? I love James Franco, but where’s the next James Franco? Where are the hunks who can act?”

Where are all the real men? she cries, like every other worthless woman out there. Well J-Law; they’re busy doing important things, not standing around taking narcissistic selfies of themselves all day in the latest fashions after their shopping trip. Jennifer considers herself in the same league as Robert Redford and Paul Newman. Yes, that really sounds like a girl who has self esteem issues. Oh, I forgot to mention—in addition to being a proud fatty, Jennifer Lawrence has also been a victim of a bad childhood! So there’s even more reason for awkward girls and young women to love J-Law! Like they didn’t have enough already amirite?! Jesus Christ…

The Oscar-winning actress also shared details of her childhood, and how she was prescribed medication to help with anxiety issues.

‘My nickname was “Nitro” as in nitroglycerin. I was hyperactive, curious about everything,’ Jennifer said.

‘When my mother told me about my childhood, she always told me there was like a light in me, a spark that inspired me constantly. When I entered school, the light went out. We never knew what it was, a kind of social anxiety. But I had friends.’

But wait, Jenny has also said:

I like when things are hard; I’m very competitive. If something seems difficult or impossible, it interests me.

That hardly sounds like how someone with social anxiety would act…

I always felt dumber than everybody else. I hated it. I hated being inside. I hated being behind a desk. School just kind of killed me.

Hate arises from something we dislike, things that we find difficult to deal with. In Jennifer’s own words, she loves difficulty. It interests her. So what the hell is it Jennifer? Who are you really?

I’m from Kentucky. I used to be very personable and make eye contact and smile at people, and now all I do is look down. When I’m at dinner and one person after another keeps interrupting to take pictures, it’s like, ‘I can’t live like this.’

So she used to be personable, except she was dead inside and anxious, but that was difficult so she loved doing it, but…but… But speaking of butts! Here’s J-Law flaunting hers for someone else like a well trained dog. Note the direction she’s looking. It most certainly is not “down.”

I’d also like to note here that Jennifer Lawrence, for all her bluster (and others’) about her being a great actress, was discovered not through talent, but because someone saw her on the street.

According to HollyScoop, Lawrence was first discovered at the age of 14 in New York by a, “passer buyer,” and made her first on-screen appearance in Devil You Know.

What is more likely? A talent agent walking around New York saw a dour, chubby girl with her face to the ground, her hands probably wrapped tightly around her backpack straps, trudging along the side walk with a defeated look and thought, “Now there’s a star!” Or did this person (with a well honed “talent agent’s” predatory sense) see a pretty girl in good shape, all smiles and radiance, and think, “She’s hot, and in a few years she’ll be legally bangable. I bet I could make her an actress for cheap.”

For all the hate he receives, at least Justin Beiber was discovered because he could sing. Jennifer Lawrence. What a great model for young girls. Be hot, lie about who you are as a person and walk around hoping that someone will discover you. The modern American dream.

In Conclusion

Jennifer Lawrence is either an idiot or a liar. Regardless of which, she most certainly is not a role model for any women of any age. At least she shouldn’t be: unfortunately in our culture of talentless whores being propelled on the broken backs of men, I have to conclude that perhaps J-Law is a role model for the modern western woman. Selfish, narcissistic, slutty, a rampant liar. Jenny will tell people whatever she thinks they want to hear to make them like her. She buys credence with women using her mouth (“I’m like, totally just like you fat, socially awkward rejects lol!”) and she buys credence with men by using her body.

I am just a normal girl…

At this point, Jennifer Lawrence may very well be. What a sad commentary that is for modern women.

Read More: Helen Mees Is A Feminist Role Model