The current state of Western rock music is total disarray. Old guard and true-to-their-roots legends such as Tom Petty, Malcolm Young, and Lemmy Kilmister have all been dying in quick succession. Meanwhile, middle-aged veterans such as California’s Green Day, Sweden’s Millencolin, and Ireland’s U2 (even more so than ever) have been reinventing themselves as cringy SJW cuck-rockers to try and stay relevant.

Most insultingly, whenever a newer and younger 20-something band gets any media rotation, it all seems to be dominated by bland indie-rock soy boys who probably live in Portland.

In a world where hypersexual and profanity laced hip-hop and “skank pop” have otherwise taken over the charts, things are not looking too bright for aficionados of good ol’ rock n’ roll. However, there is indeed an overseas alternative. Enter Japan.

“Are you ready to rock?”

As if they aren’t struggling enough to not do anything wrong with their society, Japan still recognizes that there is a valuable place for un-cucked and non-degenerate rock bands in the domestic market.

Most surprisingly, there are a number of very talented all-female groups in the country who manage to keep their skin tattoo-free and their hair (most of the time) devoid of unnatural/degenerate colors or butt-ugly buzz cuts. We’ll now take a look at three of the most popular in recent times, with each hailing from a different genre.

Scandal (Pop Rock)

While sonically different in many respects, Scandal can be summed up as the Foo Fighters of Japanese chick rock. They easily fill up arenas, they’re mostly radio-friendly, and while they might not be anywhere close to people’s top ten favorite groups, they are disliked or despised by hardly anyone. (That’s Nickelback’s job.)

Formed way back in 2006 when the girls were only in high school, all of the group’s members are still under thirty, and yet have been giving several mini-generations of fathers in the country a valuable alternative to the utterly degenerate concert experience offered to their counterparts in the United States.

Would I prefer that my daughter listens to Scandal’s “Harukaze” (“Spring Breeze”), a song about love, loss, hopes, and dreams? Or would I prefer she listens to Ariana Grande’s “Side to Side,” which regurgitates the joys of getting a “wrist icicle” and riding a “dick bicycle?” You know the answer. The answer is that the United States needs more Scandal.


Band-Maid (Hard Rock)

Now this is my kind of music. Band-Maid are technically impressive, delightfully crunchy, and never for a second forget they are Japanese, by imaging themselves after the local maid cafe culture for stark visual/sonical contrast. From a marketing standpoint, it works wonders.

The singer/guitarist Miku Kobato (with the dual ponytails) was formerly an employee of these quirky cafes in Tokyo’s famous Akihabara district, and a fairly straightforward Internet search lead to the recruitment of lead guitarist Kanami Tōno. That lead to Akane (drums), Misu (bass), and Saiki (lead vocals) joining in to complete the lineup.

Presto! Pure rock fury! Their second full length album World Domination will be released in February 2018, and I don’t mind in the slightest if they achieve that goal.

Silent Siren (Kawaii Rock)

For those who have never been to Japan or are totally clueless to the local culture, kawaii simply means “cute,” and cuteness is a pervasive motif throughout Japanese society. Silent Siren is essentially a cutesy rock band, with soft-spoken songs ranging from teary ballads to only-in-Japan hyperactivity.

I wouldn’t be caught dead driving around to this kind of music, but I can appreciate and recognize the immense talent these young women do have. Furthermore, the meaning and message behind a lot of their songs is what I (and you) would thoroughly applaud.

For instance, the song “Akane” (either “Deep Red” or “Angry Child” depending on context) is a ballad about the now-adult singer reaffirming her love and appreciation for her father, after undergoing the typical phase of quasi-rebellion and bouts of unrequited love during her adolescent years. Where is the love and appreciation for fathers in the West?


No, no, no! Send your daughter to my show!

The United States can take some advice from Japan in how to promote genuinely good female musicians instead of walking sperm buckets like Miley Cyrus, both for the sake of society and the blissfulness of the airwaves.

However, with the self-destructive pathway that the U.S. insists on following, we are unlikely to see a turn of the tide anytime soon. In the meantime, the land of the rising sun is just having too much fun winning the culture war. Well done, Japan. Well done.

Read More: 5 Social Justice Rock Bands You Should Boycott

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