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April 16th, 2013

Don’t Date Girls With Borderline Personality Disorder

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If you date enough women, eventually you will encounter one with Borderline Personality Disorder. If autism is hyper-masculinization of the brain, it may help to think of BPD as characterizing hyper-feminization of the brain. Recent research suggests that the disorder, which afflicts 2% of the population, is linked to hormone levels and can be exacerbated by hormonal treatment such as birth control. From Wikipedia:

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a personality disorder characterized by unusual variability and depth of moods. These moods may secondarily affect cognition and interpersonal relationships.

Other symptoms of BPD include impulsive behaviour, intense and unstable interpersonal relationships, unstable self-image, feelings of abandonment and an unstable sense of self. People with BPD often engage in idealization and devaluation of themselves and of others, alternating between high positive regard and heavy disappointment or dislike. Self-harm and suicidal behavior are common and may require inpatient psychiatric care.

One night I successfully approached a knockout, the best looking girl in the entire venue. We were quick to kiss and things escalated back to her place. Luckily I was sober enough to realize something with this girl was just… off. Despite inviting me over she took offense to nearly everything I said, and not in the “you’re a jerk” way that most girls use to indicate interest. These perceived insults seemed to throw her into a complete funk, but just minutes later she was pushing me to have unprotected sex with her. She got visibly angry when I attempted to use a condom, so I thought the better of doing anything and just went to sleep.

We set up a date for later in the week, but when I picked her up she flipped out about inconsequential details like where to eat and whether to go to her place or mine, prompting me to leave her yelling on the sidewalk as I drove away in befuddlement. She called me crying five minutes later apologizing, as if she was simultaneously trying her best to piss me off but was also terrified that I would abandon her. I gritted my teeth through the date, did not attempt anything physical, and never called her again.

If you run into a broad with a few of these symptoms, watch out. BPD girls live in an unfortunate state of arrested development, as if you took a perpetually hormonal 12 year old and gave it the body and power of an adult. This is an especially dangerous combination because attractive girls, no matter how crazy, are essentially allowed to get away with anything in our society. These girls will be incredible manipulators and will turn people against you, since there is never a shortage of white knights ready to assuage a pretty girl’s perceived distress. The combination of impunity and impulsiveness makes them prime targets to throw out a false rape accusation, destroy your property, stalk you, and attempt to ruin your life from the inside out. The commonalities in the few girls I’ve encountered like this are:

Huge and unpredictable mood swings — From lovey-dovey to scary-rage in two seconds flat.

Child-like fascination with both infantile and adult subject matter — She may obsess over cute puppies and kitties, but also searches out the sensory overload like hardcore porn and gory slasher movies without batting an eye.

Risk-seeking behavior: She loves unprotected sex, gambling, and dangerous thrill-seeking. She lacks a filter before saying something or make a decision.

emotionally sensitive borderline personality disorder

Your best solution? Disengage. Walk away. Even a superlatively attractive girl is not worth the mental anguish her presence will cause. If she’s especially hot, your ego is going to push you to stay with her despite knowing that she is trouble. You have to fight this, but if you insist on putting yourself through this torment, you need to remember the following Ds:

Document. Make sure you get the “you didn’t rape me” text if you have sex with her. Video tape if necessary. Use your phone to record conversations and intimate moments.

Deflect. She’s going to raise hissy fits about nearly everything. This will happen so often that you’ll wonder whether you’re the one who’s acting strangely. Don’t take anything she says very seriously and maintain a calm, aloof demeanor.

Distance. You never, ever keep a girl like this in a relationship or even at the top of your rotation. She’s at the bottom rung of your rotation, and when you get rid of her make sure it’s a fade-out to minimize the chance of accusations, violence, vandalism, etc.

Ultimately no matter how attractive she is, dealing with this type of crazy is not worth it. Do not hesitate to kick these women to the curb if they exhibit this behavior. You’ve been warned.

Read More: Internet Dating Killed My Game


About the Author

co-authors Man Ex Machina, a new manosphere blog about game, dating, and self-improvement. Find him on Twitter here.

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