Edward Thatch
Edward was a weekly contributor at Return of Kings until he passed away unexpectedly after being crushed to death under the weight of his own massive ego. Tall, devastatingly handsome, witty, and successful; the poor lad just couldn’t handle the supreme awesomeness of his own being. May he rest in peace.
Dear Mr. Shepherd,
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you were born on a sheep farm to a family of shepherds.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you went to Shepherd University and earned an advanced degree in sheepherding.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you spend your days in the field.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you know grasslands like the back of your hand.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you protect and feed them at great expense to yourself.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you know the anatomy, physiology and psychology of sheep.
Sheep do not recognize you as a shepherd simply because you comment daily on sheep forums or read dozens of articles about sheep.
Sheep recognize you as a shepherd when you speak with authority, raise your rod, and demand compliance in an act of unbridled dominance. It’s not what you know or where you came from that matters; it’s what you do with what you know and where you’re leading that brings the lambs into the fold.
If you can’t or won’t be a wolf in sheep’s clothing, at least be a shepherd.
Very sincerely,
~ Thatch
Edward Thatch
Edward was a weekly contributor at Return of Kings until he passed away unexpectedly after being crushed to death under the weight of his own massive ego. Tall, devastatingly handsome, witty, and successful; the poor lad just couldn’t handle the supreme awesomeness of his own being. May he rest in peace.


















