Its everyone’s favorite time of year again. Flowers are blooming, the sun is out and birds are singing the beautiful song of spring.

michaelcaine

Looks Like He’s Caught a ‘Bird’

A recent year-long study by your fellow “bird watchers” here at Return of Kings has come up with an interesting insight into the young western woman’s mating habits. Oddly enough it seems that hot women – on average – will hibernate roughly half of the year. This cycle is most noticeable in 19-22 year old university girls.

September – October:

sept

The idealized romances of summer time (read: casual sex as far as the eye can see) are coming to an end. As the weather cools so do womens’ firey passions. They know there is a long winter ahead of them and many girls will forgo braving the elements for a more long-term source of companionship. University girls will start the year strong. Hookups will be easy as long as the weather remains warm and sunny. Fun will be the name of the game, but as Halloween comes around, girls -– one by one — will shack up with a guy they started banging in September.

Even though they’re no longer returning to university. Working women still undergo the same process. Summers are filled with partying and good times. Autumn comes and they taper their partying to a smaller social circle and thus land the winter boyfriend to leech attention and affection reserves off of.

November – January:

By this point women are reaching full hibernation mode. As you’ll most likely notice there will be significantly fewer beautiful women roaming around. They’ll be replaced by girls in big coats with scarves who’s hotness is hard to assess. Approaches during this time of the year will lead to peak “I have a boyfriend” responses. However, the holidays bring out a certain nostalgia for girls. The weeks surrounding Christmas are laden with romantic comedies, baked goods and a longing for a Christmas miracle man. Many girls will visit home for the holidays and may be open for some fun in their home towns. (This leaves a pussy-vacuum in University towns, talent will be minimal at this time).

On New Year’s Eve drunkeness and the restlessness associated with “boyfriend cabin-fever” will lead to a peak in infidelity. If you have a harem, things will start getting rocky. Girls will start getting more distant or will drop out entirely.

February:

February 14. The most infamous holiday celebrating all that is dangerous to a quality relationship (excess chocolate and beta boy pampering) — Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day marks the turning point in the year. Spring will soon be upon us and girls will either stick around for the long haul or reach the point of critical ass and split. Harems have a 69% chance of completely collapsing, but think on the bright side there will be that many more single girls out there.

In the weeks after valentine’s day online dating sites blow up with just dumped, or lovelorn girls looking for some alpha love. Take advantage of this my fellow player.

March – May:

spring break

March and April are usually both pretty quiet. You will definitely see more and more beautiful women dressed in revealing clothing and you should use this as the motivation to approach. Once May rolls around girls the world ’round will be working out to get into shape for the beach, buying new clothing. and generally getting excited for the coming summer. Spring break will be the craziest time here so go hard.

June – August:

Summer is in full swing now and so are the beautiful women. They are fully out of their hibernative state and on the prowl for the good times of summer and the drunken memories held thenceforth.

As an aspiring “world Don Juan” you should observe and note the habits of women. Adopt their patterns for yourself. Start building a harem come the end of summer to last yourself the winter. Use this time to work on yourself and take a break from the grind of game. Come spring, when your girls begin dropping out of the rotation start the hunt once more and prep for the winter.

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