Cooking: every man, at some point, has to cook something to eat. My father was a manly man type, he served in the Marines, could rebuild a car engine, was good at sports, and so on. One of the biggest “man lessons” he imparted to me was “A man should know how to cook.” Presumably, this was because my mother was a lousy cook, and my dad had to figure something out. His options being to just eat the dried out nigh-on-being-burnt “food”…or starve to death.

Too many men these days subsist on sodium-filled frozen food, drive-thru menus, and general food related garbage. Not only do they not know the first thing about cooking for themselves, but all that quick and easy food is making them unattractive and fat. No lady worth her salt wants that, let alone tries to procreate with it.

Let us dust off those nacho cheese chip crumbs and look in to why you should learn how to cook, shall we?

1. It’s much more impressive than you think

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Cooking is way more impressive to a lady than anything you could possibly show her. Fat stacks? Muscles? Vehicle? Your night-moves in the bedroom? These all pale in comparison if you find out her favorite dish to eat and MAKE it for her mouth face.

However, you don’t even have to learn anything about her if you want. Make the ONE thing you’re really good at and that will still be more impressive than any fine dining experience.

2. It teaches crisis management skills

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Congratulations, you have now imbued your kitchen with that much sought after smoky aroma.

When you begin cooking a whole meal, you have to learn time management. But more importantly you need to learn how to handle yourself in the kitchen should the need arise.

The constant need to check the oven isn’t the point of this reason. No, you needn’t keep opening the door letting all that meal-giving delicious heat out. I’m talking about things on the stove-top that could catch fire. Do you know how to put out a grease fire if you get a little sloppy and spill?

It’s the small flammable things like that that separate the men from the boys when it comes to cooking. There is surely nothing less sexy than immolating your own home.

3. Cooking never gets old

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Learning to cook is great in that it’s a perpetuating learning cycle. Getting tired of the dinner menu planning? Try your hand at making desserts, your own bread, the possibilities never cease.

Aside from the different foods, you can always learn new techniques. At the very least you can work on your knife skills, sharpening your own blades, and investing in better kitchen utensils all in the name of making your cooking top notch!

4. Total control

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There is nothing better than manfully dominating something you set your mind to. While you may never truly be a master chef or give ol’ orange Crocs™ wearing Mario Batali a run for his money, you’ll eventually be able to exert your will over a bevy of food items and menu plans.

Once you have mastered kitchen crisis management and learned how to infuse flavor into your food without compromising taste, few things feel better. The control you have over cooking is a subtle way to let a potential lover know that you are in total control of everything and anything she throws your way will find no mercy.

5. Cooking classes are a great way to meet women

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Pictured: a woman trying to use a knife.
Not pictured: couple sitting the Emergency Room because she sliced a gash in to her arm that’s not holding the vegetable PROPERLY!

In fact, many adult learning classes offered in your area are a great way to meet women and learn a new skill. Well, making a solid birdhouse is debatable, but still a few cooking classes will teach you what good!

Oftentimes a cooking class will offer a specific menu to learn on top of teaching basic kitchen knowledge (for example, “hot things are hot”), learning how to use a knife, and other skills. In between the learning, or when someone catches on fire, maybe chat up a lady in the class that you have had your eye on?

If you and this cooking class paramour actually hit it off, then nothing is better than having a partner that also knows their way around a kitchen and could lend their expertise to the proceedings! Maybe she has a familial cooking tradition or passed down technique that could really shake up a few of your dinners?

Man has been cooking things since the dawn of time, when he first brought fire back to his cave and roasted a morsel for himself and his cave nug, so nothing could be manlier than learning to cook for you. If you succeed at it, you get amazing things to eat and share with others. If you fail, you oftentimes still get something to eat, or at the very least, a great story about the time you singed off your eyebrows pan-frying some chicken!

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