Dating rok4_girl

March 5th, 2013

12

How Myers Briggs Can Elevate Your Game

By

During my night approaches, I tend to shy away from scripted routines after the first couple of minutes. I respect guys who can put together engaging stories and deploy them with surgical precision, but my style tends to be a bit more conversational and extemporaneous.

Among an educated crowd in venues that promote conversation, one subject I often bring up is psychology, specifically personality types and their idiosyncrasies. Girls love to talk about their personalities, since it taps into their deep-rooted need to be part of a larger identity group, yet allows them enough leeway to show they are special snowflakes.

If I get a favorable initial reaction, I often bring up the Myers-Briggs (MBTI) personality test. The Myers-Briggs scale presents four different dimensions with two options for each, describing how a person creates energy, gathers information, makes decisions, and interacts with the world.

Myers-Briggs is a popular topic in undergraduate intro psych classes, and it may surprise you how many girls are familiar with the concept. I’ve found that about 20% of 22-28 year old girls know their type, and at least another 20% have heard of the test or are very interested in taking it. Ever notice how girls love to talk about astrology and their horoscopes? This subject touches the same interests and desires. Unlike astrology, however, it can provide valuable and actionable information to help your game.

If you know a girl’s type, you have a blueprint of what motivates them, how they are predisposed to spend their time, and how they view the world. For example, if you discover a girl is an “E” you may engage her about going out with her friends, involvement in group activities, and demonstrate that you are open to new experiences. If she’s an “I”, you will likely be able to have a deeper conversation where you emphasize your more introverted hobbies (traveling alone, playing a music instrument, writing) to build comfort and attraction.

The next level of incorporating MBTI comes when you can tailor your short and long-term game based on specific personality types. These are just a few examples:

INTJ / INTP - Their brains are wired more like men. You can have rational and often insightful conversations with them, and drama will be minimal compared with other types. Sex often has wild/rough elements. They may lack the feminine “spark” that immediately endears them to you, but you can spend a peaceful day with this type without wanting to tear your hair out. They are likely to be shy at the beginning. Challenge them with wit and show physical/intellectual dominance. A rare type for girls.

ENFJ - Many nurses and teachers fall into this category. These girls are sweet and will respond positively to small bits of “beta game”. ENFJs care about others, and they can be more engaging because they actually want to hear about your ideas and feelings. One of the best types to date in my experience.

ENFP - Prom queens. ENFPs are used to getting attention, and their egos are validated almost solely by the adoration of others. To capture her interest you need to push-pull as much as possible. Give her slight interest and then withdraw mercilessly. The script-flipping of making her search for your approval will bond her to you even more than with the average girl. If you’re an introvert, you’ll have to resist her pressure to go out more, meet people, and engage in social obligations in which you have little interest.

ESTP - These girls have a constant need for novelty and are keen manipulators. If you want to keep them in your rotation, switch things up and keep her guessing. ESTPs can range from absolute pleasures to used car salesmen, depending on your awareness of their subtle manipulation and how much you let them get away with.

INFJ - Ultimately you will get tired of dealing with their feelings. More than any other type, these girls have solid intuitions that they will follow blindly, even in the face of incontrovertible rational discourse. Their depth and number of feelings can be overwhelming to a repeated interaction, since they live in their heads more than ENFJs. May be more prone to depression and anxiety.

You can take the test for yourself, and familiarize yourself with the categories and the 16 types here.

As game continues to evolve from furry hats and magic tricks to a more optimized, lifestyle-oriented pursuit, specialization is a necessity to get the most out of your approaches. Familiarity with Myers-Briggs types provides insight that often takes precious time and effort to gather otherwise. By limiting the generalized game you pull from your normal playbook, Myers-Briggs can accelerate the process of building attraction and maintaining your frame, giving you an edge on the competition.

Read More: The Father Of Relationship Game Shares His Secrets



About the Author

co-authors Man Ex Machina, a new manosphere blog about game, dating, and self-improvement. Find him on Twitter here.

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  • Samseau

    Fantastic analysis.

  • Simple Man

    This is brilliant. I’m a pretty well-adjusted INFJ/INTJ. I still go out and party/socialize a fair amount when not busy with work but am still fundamentally an introvert. And, when I go out, I’m fine with hitting the club alone.

    This particular note about the ENFP is spot-freaking-on: “If you’re an introvert, you’ll have to resist her pressure to go out more, meet people, and engage in social obligations in which you have little interest.”

    I just broke up with my ENFP girlfriend for a few reasons but this one of them. They are forever ‘on the go’ and it’s VERY easy to get drawn into their exciting, but equally frenetic, social life. After a while, it just wears you out. If you’re an Introvert, beware the ENFP/ESFP: they are a blast but will wear you out if you’re not careful.

    I’ve found, though, that ENFP/ESFP chicks tend to calm down a bit in their 30s but don’t bank on it. These are your quintessential party girls – you know the up and downsides of dating one.

  • Whitehall

    People tend, as they mature, to move towards the center. So younger women will be more outliers on the edge of the box.

    You will sometimes see personal ads offering M-B typology – which I’ve often found offputting to some degree.

    I would also argue that there are some underlying corrolations in birth signs – even more women know their astrological sign and you can always use it in bar conversations. However, I’ll keep that practical information to myself.

  • sklebano

    Interesting! If she is aware of her MBTI type you build great rapport. Even if not, the door is wide open for qualification, and if you can convince her to take the Myers-Briggs, I’d think she’s all yours.

  • prep

    Well done. I’ll have to really keep this in mind when screening girls.

    There’s a 72 question MBTI app for Android. Is there such thing as a shortened test that could be loaded on my GS2 that I could use to engage a girl at the bar with? For that matter, are there other similar fun and engaging type apps that you guys are using to explore “play games” with your targets and reach their deep/emotional/physic planes?

  • fjod

    I’ve been aushra stuff for >6 years. thats where mbti takes its origins. in russia it’s called “socionica”. some pieces of advice to you

    1. dont take these “tests” seriously. consider them more like a “palm” reading. somewhat verified type assumption can be mode only by experience. try to ask additional info with every question to understand the person better. test is more like a way how the “typing” should be conducted
    2. dont mess intertype relations with, well, relations.

    3. I’ve become to consideration that mbti works more like a somewhat Newton law. it works anyway, do you know it or you dont. you wont produce good relations with a person, with who you have really bad intertype relations. it’s like you just on different wavelengths. you understand why it’s bad, but there is no way to change your type.

    4. for me, mbti was more a way to understand myself. it’s VERY difficult to “type” people correctly. it should be a great routine though. I should refresh it and try in the field :)
    5. and if u’ve managed to understand her type, read carefully about her “skeletons in the wardrobe” just to know, which topics/routines should not be brought into your game and which will influence her mostly ^^

    • fjod

      forgot to tell that people with same types have similar faces.

  • Turbo the drycleaner

    The briggs test is mostly barnum effect (google it) but you are right in that, like anything to do with the barnum effect its great for building rapport with people.

  • Best Letter

    Psychology is definitely a deep well you can mine in a set, girls eat that shit up.

  • http://acehaley92.wordpress.com/ Ace Haley

    This doesn’t have enough comments. Great article

  • Pieman

    I’ve been studying MBTI for a few years. A very good book to read is “The art of speed reading people”. I’ve gotten a few girls to take the test too.

    These are some of the types I’ve had first hand experience with:

    ENFJs are very grounded and the cocky alpha douchebag behavior dosen’t work. They don’t dress too sexy, more conservative fashionista and have more traditional romantic ideals. They will shit test you hard with difficult questions (not drama), about your social status and career.

    ESFPs, dress sexy. ramp up the cockyness, be playful physical with them, they will be constantly giggling. They care most that the guy is fun and exciting and can constantly pump their emotional state.

    ISFPs, dress stylish trendy. Make animal noises, be an aloof comedian, don’t take yourself too seriously, and don’t be too cocky.Being a big kid around them is what makes them look up to you and makes them feel comfortable.

    ENTJs/INTJs – Intellectual discussions and bad boy behavior.

  • joss

    I’m a INTP girl !! =) An architect

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