The motherfucking first date.
This is where it all goes down. You’ve already met the girl – whether through approaching her, online dating, or otherwise – and successfully scheduled a date.
Now it’s time to capitalize on the opportunity and make the best of it.
It doesn’t matter if you’re looking for a wife or a one night stand, the same rules apply. You want to have a good time, see if you like the girl, and then escalate the attraction if you do. And I personally think that having a good time is the most important thing here.
Don’t put pressure on yourself to have to make it happen. This will only turn you into an awkward, nervous wreck and turn the date into something obligatory rather than a good time and a chance to get laid.
So while I think just enjoying yourself is rule number one, below are five tips to facilitate a good time that also gives you the best chance of taking it to the next level.
1. Get drinks
There’s a time and place to get creative when it comes to dates., but that’s not the first date.
Honestly I think it’s just trying too hard to invest more than a quick drink into someone you haven’t really gotten to know yet. But drinks are also low pressure for her (she can walk out at any time), the alcohol helps calm the first date nerves, and it’s always easy to find a convenient location (depending on your goal, you may want to choose somewhere close to your place). Either way, no need to overthink something so simple (this only can only lead to insecurity and doubt), just go with drinks.
2. Sit next to her
Once you’re at the bar, find some bar space or a counter where you guys can sit next to each other. This is key. It allows you to be closer to her than if you’re sitting across a table.
Being next to her will grant you the opportunity to touch her – and her the opportunity to touch you. Capitalize on this and touch her at organic points in the conversation, when you guys are laughing or when you’re telling a story, for example.
3. Lead the interaction
This is crucial. At all points during the date you should be leading the way.
Pick the bar. Pick where you’re sitting. Order the drinks. Lead the conversation.
And a big one: after getting one round, make the move to another bar. This keeps things fun and prevents them from getting stale for both of you.
Taking the lead shows that you’re a confident and masculine man, and it can help make her feel “secure” in your presence. Above I listed just a few things to focus on, but you should take the lead in all aspects of the date.
4. Ask the right questions
So while the exact content of the conversation isn’t important, you can connect with her on a deeper level by asking the right questions. The key here is to avoid the boring “yes” or “no” questions, and stick to more open-ended questions. You can’t go wrong with “how’s” and “what’s” (these are better than asking “why?”).
For example, if a girl tells you she grew up on New York City, you could take two different approaches.
The boring approach: “Did you like growing up there?”
Or in the interesting approach: “What did you like about growing up there?”
The latter is open-ended, and requires an expanded response, which leaves more opportunity to dive deep and make a stronger connection. Use this technique to deal with the inevitable first few rounds of getting-to-know-each-other Q and A and the date will be off to a strong start.
5. Hold her hand
This last one might seem overly aggressive, or like you’re trying too hard to be her boyfriend. But I assure you that it’s pure gold.
Girls love this. It builds up that “we’re on an adventure” together vibe and escalate the physical play and sexual tension like nothing else. I suggest you use this move while changing locations.
I strongly believe that being confident and honest is all it takes to become a dating powerhouse and attract women into your life. Keep your focus on building yourself up and use these tips to help you set up a killer first date.
Read More: How To Free Yourself From The Need For Women