I will soon bid farewell to the fair shores of my beloved Normandy in order to live in Poland.

Many factors influenced my decision. Their excellent martial arts clubs. The fulfilling previous stays. The nurturing, gentle nature of Polish women that Roosh described in his works (a nature that I personally encountered many times).

I will focus on another major one: French women and their mindset.

I discovered the concept of game with my best friend, who is from the other side of the iron curtain (his motto: “Fuck her. If it’s not her, it will be another one. They are all sluts, they all have a price”). After years of institutional brainwashing, I finally saw the girls of France under their true colours. Their flaws, their systematic rejection just for the sake of it, their hordes of white knights.

I left for six years, encountered many cultures and my skills improved. So did my well-being as a man. I recently came back home and had the foolish hope that my hardened opinion of the local girls would have mellowed with age and distance. That they would be different this time.

By Odin’s ravens, was I wrong.

But what are the myths that were sold overseas, that would make you want to have sex specifically with a French girl?

1. They are sexy and sexual beings 

France’s most coveted vaginas

The number one fear of the French girl is to act in a way that will lead others to think that she is a slut, even if, in all fairness, they take significantly more cock in their three holes than what their mother recommended. It might be the only factor that (relatively) spared us a copious amount of slut-walks.

Among all the cultures encountered, they are on top of my list with the amount of mind games played in order to delay sex and save appearances. They became masters in the art of breaking balls and wasting male time so they can laugh about it in their social circle and label any interested heterosexual male a creep.

They repress their sexuality but behind closed doors, same rules apply. Isolate, inebriate, initiate as John Hopson wrote, and they will give in. You will have to put in a fair amount of work and remain focused. Weak game won’t cut it.

2. They express themselves with style

Extract of your average social network feed. Victor Hugo starts a slow clap from the underworld.

We have our cohorts of basic chicks as well, fellas. The French chick often thinks that she is a princess, regardless of her ordinary physique, and throws the according tantrums. They bombard the social network with attention-seeking statements and images. They also have the picture with the reverse snapback cap with “OBEY” or “SWAG” on it, modern mark of the uneducated masses.

They are enthusiastic artisans in the decline of the standard French language. Gangster talk is extremely popular along with English catch phrases (big up, love you baby…). The vocabulary is limited to little more than a thousand different words.

They indeed used to express themselves with class and wit. Those days are long gone. Classy French girls are like unicorns. I saw some once on the telly. That’s about it.

3. They are direct

 

They will feign ignorance when a man wants to meet them alone. You made your intentions clear. You want to lower her knickers and play doctor but she will pretend that you just want to have the honour of sharing her company. Go through the text message hell and she will often asks if she can bring a friend or she’ll bring one without asking. French girls could win a gold medal if cockblocking was an Olympic sport.

Compliment them, you are a liar. Neg them, you are an arsehole. They don’t respond well to direct approach and day game.  Any stranger that could talk to them is a potential sex offender. They also think that they will be considered sluts if they answer positively to one. Go through with your ramble, they will sigh, raise their eyebrows and look at you like a pile of manure while getting ready to cry rape.

In a club, you will often face the immediate turn of head or complete body as soon as you open your mouth, even after she displayed indicators of interest. It could be daunting for beginners. Insistence is sometimes rewarded but with their mind games, mixed signals and in view of the hard work needed, next her.

4. They are educated and cultured

 

They lack education or are too educated. You will rarely find something in the middle. Independent thinkers? They celebrate stupidity like any other western girl. Nabilla (French Kim Kardashian) is now a household name. So are Youtube pseudo-celebrities Cyprien and Norman. Individuals with no achievements are celebrated as their audience sees itself in their platitudes.

They love to hop on the social justice train and the latest trends. Harlem Shake, ice bucket challenge, share if you would save your mom from a house on fire, Je Suis Charlie, Like if you want little Joël to get his heart transplant. No need to understand or to analyse, they just follow.

5. They know how to cook and how to drink

 

It used to be a standard for a young French girl to know how to cook an array of quality meals. Their mother would warn them that no man would want them otherwise. By the destruction of the traditional gender roles, our women stopped aiming at being kind hostesses, masters of the culinary arts, to recently become vastly incompetent cooks, hardly able to boil an egg.

They also forgot how to drink properly. They only display three patterns:

1. They don’t drink at all. They show their moral superiority to us, mere mortals. They are usually unattractive but will insist on leaving early, pulling their more bangable friend by the arm. “If I am not having fun, why should the others?”

2. They moderately drink but only what magazines told them to drink. Mojitos, Cosmos, to do like in Sex and the City.

3. They drink too much and poor quality drinks. Cheap beer, mediocre wine, and low-priced spirits drowned in soda. They often vomit after intoxication and collect decisions  that they regret the next morning.

6. They will be able to raise children

femme-enfant

They lost their traditional values of being exemplary mothers. American female authors recently wrote (bear with me) about French women educating their children well AND focusing on their careers. As you guessed it, it’s going through the window.

Add a decline of fertility among white French couples, risky drinking behaviour endangering the possibility to bear children, female career-driven obsession since the events of 1968 (French equivalent of Woodstock, flower power sprinkled with a hint of nation-wide riots) where “A child with whom I want when I want” was the motto and we have a winner.

Abortion was legalized in 1975, many long-term and morning after pills are free with our healthcare, and the state will refund the money spent for an abortion. More tokens for the cock carousel.

It’s okay to try a lot of cocks but don’t spank children. Degenerate French female psychiatrist Françoise Dolto said “Let the child be king and express itself”. Ideal way to create armies of ungrateful, uneducated and future criminal little shits. My dad used to say “A smack on the arse won’t make it fall off.”

7. They wear stylish clothes

There is a new widespread and convenient fashion where young French women are dressed like transgender bin liners. If not part of it, they just dress like millions of others, no effort or originality is needed.

They are always wearing trousers or jeans. They all have the same scarf, the same beanie, the same leather or denim jacket and the same fucking Converses. The “classier” alternative are flats or ballerinas. Forget high heels, lads, “it would make me look like a slut and it hurts my feet.”

French glamour

8. They are agreeable and have a sense of humour

 

The French girls you will approach without being previously approved by their social circles are likely to give you the cold shoulder. They will rarely be smiling if you interact with them. In the public transport, in the shops, at the post office, the “resting bitch face” is the norm.

They will often justify it, saying that if they smile or seem approachable, people (read “unworthy men by their standards”) will bother them. Whatever you say to them, they give you the feeling that they are about to die of boredom.

I am a strong supporter of telling the truth. If you don’t like what is being said, cut short to the conversation. That’s life. Humans interact when a community exists. Our girls have the skills to work as lighthouse keepers.

9. They are all slim

Even if France has relatively good dietary habits, the globalization of the fast food industry did not spare us and we face an unprecedented epidemic of obesity.

They have a junkie behaviour towards everything that is sweet. Whipped cream, custard, macarons, cupcakes… A sugar hit to compensate an absence of fulfilling experiences. They don’t need a man, they have a pound of chocolate with hazelnuts and all the seasons of Grey’s Anatomy to sob alone in their beds.

Many persuade themselves and the others nowadays that it is not their fault if they are fat, that they are “big-boned,” or “curvy.” Selfies and compliment fishing on the internet comfort them in their opinion, their slimmer friends leading the way so they won’t be the grenade that a poor sod will have to jump on. It is not acceptable to tell one of their large friend that she should hit the treadmill more often in order to be healthier.

“Whatever, my big friend is beautiful. You are just a big meanie. I like to keep her around when I go out then I receive compliments and free drinks from the thirsty lads.”

10. They are feminine

Cinema will make you think that you will find the likes of Emmanuelle Béart and Mélissa Theuriau in the streets of your average French city. We had feminine girls but they are a dying breed. The average Russian girl would laugh if she discovered what French girls consider feminine nowadays.

About body hair. It is not that they don’t wax or tend to it. They just do it in a lazy manner. Ah, the sensation of improperly shaven legs, the impression that you pulled a sandpaper doll at the club. It is especially poorly done around the armpits and the bikini area. You see the hairs growing back on the side, the cuts, the works.

But they can’t shave their pussy entirely. What would the public opinion be? The girls who shave it all usually shame it as well, or the crowd would once more brand them with the seal of infamy, the slut label. The French bush still lives in the minds of foreign lads for a reason. That and the one where the French don’t shower.

11. They appreciate a manly man

 

They only want you to spend money on them with nothing in return (if you’re not the alpha that fucked her on the same night you met her). They cry day and night that they want total equality of the sexes. But try to split the bill and it will soon go south. They usually want to crush the male under their foot. In a relationship, she wants baby language, a beta that showers her with gifts, while she organises the life and whereabouts of the couple.

With a rising number of divorces, hippie values, and mottos like “I am a strong independent woman who does not need a man,” daddy issues are common in France. It is all fun and games until the little angel brought into this world by these values replicates them. But the father figure that embodies authority is gone.

They are also largely supportive of effeminate men and androgynous models. Bodybuilding, martial arts, and hunting are still frowned upon as they are likely to be the mark of  violent man, a woman beater and a sadist who enjoys torturing animals.

Conclusion

Many, like me, had enough. So we took our dicks and our knives, seeking adventure and greener pastures.

A lot of you will tell me “But Jean-Bat, I fucked a French girl, it went fine.” I can almost guarantee that if you did, you are not a beginner in the game or it did not take place in France. Our girls travel overseas alone or with girlfriends for the same reason as yours.

Some lads consider travelling to France with the capture of their French flag in mind. There are countless reasons to discover my country but this one is not worth the investment.

My foreign brothers, if you still want to fuck a French girl after all that, I salute your thirst for a challenge and your testicular fortitude. By all means, go for it. But if you have the choice and a strong lack of patience like myself, look  towards the Nordic “heavens,” official residence of unredeemable sword swallowers or head for Eastern Europe to have your mind (and your knob) blown.

To my French countrymen, go check what happens overseas. See what they offer on the other side of the fence if you have not done it yet. And never forget why you left in the first place.

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