Thanks to the work of the Roosh V Forum’s Indian Race Troll, the subject of brown men and interracial dating has come under a lot of scrutiny. My fellow brown writer bojangles wrote an excellent post entitled “6 Things Indian Guys Have To Understand When Learning Game” where the first point and perhaps most critical point he made was that brown men need to let go of limiting racial beliefs and insecurities if they want to improve their game. As showcased by the once endless stream of “Do girls from X country like Indian men?” questions, there clearly exists a subset of Indian men who are anxious about whether or not they will have success dating non-Indian girls. This post will explore the in’s and out’s of game for brown men, exploring both the causes and the solutions for their problems with dating interracially.
Full disclosure before we proceed: I am an extremely Westernised brown guy from a non-Indian background, but am mistaken for one half the time so I consider myself qualified to help my fellow brown men out. Men of other races, particularly East Asian men will also benefit from this post to a certain extent.
Is Racism The Problem?
One of the most common insecurities among brown guys asking for game advice is that non-brown girls and in particular, white girls are racist against brown men in terms of dating. Now I want all of you to picture the most stereotypically racist type of person you can think of in the Western world. Whether it’s indeed true or not, the vast majority of readers just pictured something along the lines of an elderly, rural white man (riot in the comments from the HBD’ers in 3,2,1)… Now imagine the stereotypically least racist type of person you can think of.
A young, urban, single white women probably came to mind. The bleeding heart liberal, SWPL type of white girl, who are a dime a dozen in the places where brown people congregate most densely in the West: the major cities of England, Canada, Australia and New Zealand as well as the San Francisco Bay, New York and Washington D.C metropolitan areas of the United States. The type of women that some brown men think they cannot sleep with due to racism are the least racist cohort of people in the world, and probably of all of human history so far. Since these are the girls that Indian men will have to approach the most as they improve their game, racism is not the primary issue here. Hell, the latest fad for hipster white girls at the moment is wearing bindi’s on their forehead, not to mention the popularity of Indian culture and yoga among the SWPL types.
Many Indian and Asian men starting out in game use racism as a defence mechanism to rationalize and distance themselves from the damage inflicted to their ego by their first rejections on approaches. Even I, a completely Westernized brown guy who’d already been dating white girls before I started cold approaching had that thought creep into my head a few times early on while doing direct daygame on the street. This lingering thought of “Is she not talking to me because I’m brown?” comes from the exact same place as does looks, age and height insecurities do. It is your rationalization hamster tricking you into believing you will never be able to improve your success with women due to whatever insecurity you have so that you won’t exert the time and energy that it takes to improve. Your mind is your greatest enemy here and to get over that, you simply just have to approach a lot.
Does Skin Tone Matter?
When the Indian Race Troll was unmasked, a number of guys commented about how light an Indian he was, mistakenly assuming that many brown men’s lack of success with women of other races stems from their darker skin tone. This always seemed preposterous to me because white women where I come from have a reputation overseas for having a thing for African American men. In reality, it is not the darker pigment that is responsible for Indian men’s interracial dating troubles. Darker brown guys are actually more likely to date white women.
At first I thought it was because of being able to pull off “black guy swag” (all those years of being called “ma nigga” by suburban white kids who’ve never met a black guy will not have been in vain!), but then I realized that it is (at least partially) because Muslim and observant Sikh Desi men are lighter skinned (since they’re from North of the subcontinent) and those two groups very rarely date out. As such, the skin tone of brown men dating out actually skews darker than brown male population as a whole. Other than that though it makes no difference. The portion of girls who are closed off to dating brown guys don’t give a damn whether you’re on the lighter or the darker side.
The Culprit Is Indian Culture
So then why do some Indian men struggle with non-Indian women? First off it should be noted that it’s not like South Asian men are the only guys who struggle with dating. The vast majority of guys of every race have poor game.
It’s because of their culture. South Asia’s cultures produce the most beta men of anywhere on the planet after East Asia. Young brown men are conditioned from birth to study hard to get into a good college and then get a prestigious white collar job (preferably Doctor or Engineer) with which they can fund a mortgage and buy a Mercedes with their well educated wife of the same religious background as them. Rosca from the Roosh V Forum nailed it when he said about my own parents that “they’re trying to make you beta”. Brown parents purposely try to produce beta sons and they are quite good at doing it.
Many brown parents will tell their Western raised sons that white women are sluts who never cook or clean (I was basically taught Red Pill 101: Introduction to Western Women from a rather young age), but never have an ill-word to say about brown girls, who can be raging sluts to rival their white neighbours if raised in a Western country. This, in combination with Bollywood movie storyline’s cause Indian men to place their own women on gigantic pedestals, but also see non-Indian women as out of reach.
This is compounded by the fact that not only do brown people congregate in a few cities, they also congregate heavily in certain neighbourhoods and schools, creating a generation of native born FOB brown boys with predominantly South or East Asian friends with whom they perpetuate their FOBness while having little to no contact with the mythical white woman, who they are also unlikely to mingle with in their Engineering or I.T college classes or work places. People want what they can’t have. What is rare has more value to them. As such, they have now placed white and brown girls on two distinct pedestals.
Don’t Act Fresh Off The Boat
The more culturally Fresh Off the Boat one is, the more this is the case. There tends to be a direct correlation with how culturally attuned an Indian is to his ancestral background to how worse he’ll do with Western women, simply because their traditional mindset, it’s ensuing pedestalization and overall betaness are a massive turn off for them. Incidentally, I have met a couple FOB brown men with hot girlfriends who migrated from relatively traditional Southern Europe, which is something you’ll rarely see in the English speaking world. Roosh explicitly states in Bang Ukraine that Indian men also do well with Ukrainian girls, a sign that the traditional mindset of most Indian men that Western women detest is something that women in non-feminist countries may actually prefer.
The damage that FOBness does to Indian men’s game is why Americans seem to have by far the lowest opinion of Indian’s game out of any country, as Indian Americans tend to be much more recent arrivals and make a smaller portion of the population there than say in the U.K, where one can meet thoroughly Westernised third generation Indians whose ancestors have lived there since the 1960’s. Should the flow of new immigrants come to a halt, the collective game of Indian men would climb rapidly as they Westernize, break out of their enclaves and abandon their traditional views on sexuality morality which stunts the development of their game.
So What Is The Solution?
Unless you live in a predominately brown country (good luck, you’re going to need it), even if you want to get a girl from your own background in the end to settle down with you’re going to have to approach a large volume of girls to improve your game, which necessitates gaming girls of other races. Accept that the reason you might not do well with girls of other race is about YOUR lack of game and YOUR limiting beliefs and racial insecurities, which instantly dry women’s pussies. Admit that you might suck, all the guys of other races just starting out suck too. Working on losing any accent you may have is very important, although most recent migrants who still have accents would rather marry a plain jane Indian doctor and start a family than learn game so that will not apply to most of you. Replace your glasses with contacts or get laser eye surgery. Most of you will also need to drastically change your wardrobe.
Sexy Stereotype Yourself
Why? Because Indian (and Asian) men have such a high proportion of beta males among them that white women sometimes automatically think you’re beta. If you are dressed like the average dude, girls will assume you are an average (read: geeky beta) Indian. If you’re swole and wearing a tank top or are rocking an urban, punk, indie, metalhead, hipster or any other kind of distinct look you will pique her interest due to your rarity and escape much of the negative beta connotations you’ll get for dressing like the average guy does. Having girls blatantly checking out your sweet style isn’t going to hurt you on your path to purging yourself of your racial insecurities either. Young guys generally have an easier time standing out with a little dress sense as well due to the abysmal competition.
This will shock many American readers, but the most common interracial pairing in the English speaking Commonwealth countries involving a white woman is with a brown man. There are roughly twice as many East Asian than South Asian people in my city, yet brown men date out more heavily than Asian and Middle Eastern men and I even see a fair few Brown guy – Asian girl pairings as well now but none of the other way around. It is very easy to notice these sorts of things with scanning around for any cute girls to approach in the daytime in high traffic areas. Personally, I think Brown and Asian guys who actually think they couldn’t get girls of different backgrounds because of their own race never leave the house much or they think “that couple doesn’t count because the guy is good looking or ripped etc.” which only proves my point that race is not a critical factor for brown guys in dating.
You May Have To Put In More Work
I am not going to lie to you and say that race does not matter at all however. There will always be some portion of non-brown girls who are either completely closed off to dating out or whose mistaken assumption that you are beta just for being Indian costs you a potential bang you would’ve gotten had you been white. These girls are usually less intelligent and less educated on average and this is also more common with girls from rural areas. Studies show exposure to another ethnic group, whether or not they are of a different race improves peoples opinions of them. Remember that most white girls in the cities where most diaspora Indians live grew up with some of them from kindergarden.
The ones who don’t know many brown guys think we all fit certain stereotypes and the assumption that you are beta right off the bat will just be something you’ll have to overcome either through game, getting ripped in the gym or doing something like getting piercings or tattoos. At the end of the day however you’re just going to have to approach that extra % more than other guys to match their results, which in the long term will help you because the better your game gets, the less race (and a myriad of other factors) matter.
Really though, if a girl is sitting around in a bar or coffee shop open to being approached she’s not going to be suddenly become closed off when approached just because of your skin colour. You will have your shot at her just like guys of every other race will. White girls also do not have to worry about being judged by their friends or family if they sleep with you, as there is zero social stigma for dating with a brown guy either (at least in the places where most of the Indian diaspora live), which is the biggest hurdle to interracial dating that there is.
What About Indian Girls?
My final piece of advice to brown guys is not to avoid gaming brown girls, but also to realize that they are not pure snowflakes. Take the pussy off the pedestal. Western white girls are non-traditional and promiscuous just like your mother told you, but so are a lot of Western brown girls. Brown girls prefer brown guys, even the ones with predominately white friends. The one’s that do sleep with white guys will also sleep with brown guys as well. Westernised Indian girls do however detest the FOBish Indian men just like their white sisters do. This is why brown guys who say they struggle with white girls actually struggle with every race of girl, because they have no game. Even if they woke up the next day as a white dude called Steve they’d still suck with girls.
Brown people tend to not hit up nightlife all that much, so when you do spot a hot brown girl in the bar or club make a beeline for her if there aren’t many other brown guys in the venue. There are a lot more attractive ones than stereotypes would lead you believe (the quality is much higher among the diaspora than it is on the sub-continent itselfF) and there are many who are remarkably feminine despite being raised in the West. Every guy has a type or number of different types of girls that he’ll have a niche in. By default, brown girls will be one of those niches for you by virtue of being brown yourself. The other types of girls you may also have a niche in will come down to individual variance, but I encourage you to push the boundaries and approach all different types of girls as well beyond the girls you already do best with.
You never know, you may well be the first cool, fun, extroverted “Alpha” brown guy without an inferiority complex that a girl has ever met. You are her one and only shot for her to score her Indian flag. She’ll never meet any other guy quite like you. You are the prize.