The image above is from the new about-to-be-rebuilt Greek Orthodox church on Ground Zero in New York. The outside of the building is designed to light up at night. That and the blandness of the interior are reflective on the sterility of modern Christianity, and the fact that the Orthodox allowed a Spanish Catholic to design it is revealing on the secularist mindset of the Eastern Orthodox Church today.

Yes, the Christian sect that red pill man-crush Vladimir Putin strong-arms for has built that hideous work of compromise. All forms of Christianity today have gone from teaching doctrine to teaching doubt. Even Eastern Orthodoxy—often thought of as the most beautiful and hardline sect of Christianity—panders to whatever ideology of the day is in fashion, which in turn trickles down into its aesthetics.

I promised I’d write on this again, so here we are. The church on your street-corner likely teaches all sorts of sensationalist doctrine designed to retain a high quantity of members instead of a high quality. And as a result, we see that church membership is sinking. The young generation no longer feels like they can trust the authority of religious institutions and often leaves to find alternative spiritualities.

What happened to the young that made them so distrustful of everything they knew growing up? Here are a few lessons you were taught in church that will make you grow up to be a miserable person.

“Loving Yourself Means Thinking Highly Of Yourself”

I used to have a close Christian mentor. He often told me, “One sin I struggle a lot with is low self-esteem.” Today I put my hand on my forehead when I think about that. This push for self-esteem at any cost is what has made my generation all fat and worthless. We want to blame the public schools for it, but the churches are almost as bad.

For those of you who grew up in American Christianity, recall VeggieTales’s “God loves you because you are unique” ethic at the end of every episode.

The theological and semantic errors in that are for another forum. Suffice it to say that Christians—exactly like liberal secularists—keep on and on about “love” but define it however it best fits their current purposes. Christianity wants to see itself as the center of the community, so they willingly adopt the ethics and definitions of the public schools. True, Jesus commanded to love yourself. But that doesn’t mean to think you’re a winner no matter how much you screw up your life.

A radiant offender in this is the ever-popular church league franchise Upward Basketball, often a bulwark of the local community. There is no tournament after the season, and they often don’t keep score or call fouls. But every kid walks away with a trophy and a Bible, giving them a weird feeling of accomplishment while knowing that they either didn’t accomplish anything if their team was bad or that they should have been allowed to accomplish more if their team was good.

Then the kid grows up to think his bachelor’s degree in creative writing is an accomplishment while knowing that he would never pass engineering. If anything, you’d think the draconian view of man’s depravity in Christianity would lead one to preach self-loathing.

“Just Love Others”

This is closely related to the above. Jesus said that all morality can be summed up by this command. However, the Bible never defines “love.” Yes, there’s 1 Corinthians 13, but that only describes it. People of all ideological sects greatly abuse and misuse this term. For those of you playing along at home, I myself would define Christian love as “being as God is,” but that’s just a working definition.

This is not a benign misunderstanding either. Misguided love always becomes toxic love. Plenty of people do harmful things to each other out of a sincere concern for their well-being. Many feminists—often the quieter ones—want what is in the best interest for other women, but that does not negate how destructive their lifestyle is.

“God Has Called Everyone To A Specific Career”

This is just bizarre, but it is very common in a lot of veins of Christianity. Many people really think that God has a career planned out for you and that it is your responsibility to discern what it is. So, for example, when you are born, God decides you should be a fireman. But if you become a police officer instead, then supposedly you just haven’t listened to his guidance. 

And some people think they know God’s calling but fail to achieve it no matter how hard they try. You can see how many young people would quickly grow disenfranchised with the religion. The stronger one’s faith, the more broken it is when it shatters.

I was recently gaming a high school senior who was convinced that God wanted her to become a surgeon because “He has placed this desire in my heart.” She wouldn’t listen no matter how I tried to tell her that was a bad idea. So I had to dismiss her.

Now not only is she about to fail at a miserable career—likely before it even starts—but she also missed out on a potential soulmate. Which ties back into my point above about toxic love, since I’m sure her parents encouraged her to piss away her best years in grad school.

“Saving Sex For Marriage Is Really Important”

The problem is not so much with the ethic itself of waiting until marriage as it is that churches do nothing to create a context for this. Waiting until marriage would be easy if people got married at 15 or even 18. And they are right that you should generally have stable finances before getting married.

So if they wanted kids to wait until marriage, you’d think they’d give the incentive by encouraging kids to marry younger. And to do that, they’d push for men to go to trade school and for women to avoid careers. But our parents all think their kids are above average in intelligence with a special vocation from God. Having a blue collar kid is embarrassing, no matter how much evidence is shown that it is a better choice for financial and work satisfaction.

So today Christians push everyone to get a four-year degree, which often turns into a six-and-a-half year degree. And then there’s a grad degree, maybe. Add that to other toxic ideas taken from Hollywood and feminism that encourage emotional immaturity. So the kid is in his mid-twenties searching around for that ever-elusive good Christian girl. And of course Christians are often horrified by game theory, so Joe Good Christian Boy doesn’t stand a chance.

Likewise, Christian girls wait the same amount of time only to find that none of the guys at church are able to turn them on. The Christian guy is taught that he should date a girl for at least two years before deciding if they should get engaged, so every year that passes, he watches his youthful sexual energy slip away. The Christian male has his own biological clock.

If the Christian 14-year-old boy is looking at being maybe 25 at the earliest if he’s lucky before he has sex for the first time, then of course he’s likely saying, “No fucking way.” And if he knows he is an extreme beta (as I did), he realizes that it will be even longer. Christian girls have much the same line of thought, and hypergamy is rampant in both sexes. Add to that an implicit taboo on interacting at length with the opposite sex.

So the young Christian man or woman either fornicates and stays in church as a hypocrite, or they apostate altogether to do what they are naturally inclined to do, or they repress their most basic human urges on the hope that one day God will drop a spouse onto their doorstep. Either way, the young Christian man or woman feels generally betrayed and abandoned by church and God.

For the record, I’ve found that the Christian men wait until marriage much more often than the Christian women, despite what they told us about how it is harder for men to abstain.

Most Christian parents do not love their children. What they are concerned about is their pride. It is cruel and torturous to give their children a lifestyle and identity without a context in which to express it.

The simple solution to Christian premarital sex is to encourage boys to go to vocational school and girls to be domestic. That would also solve most of the emotional maturity issues. But the Christians won’t do that because they want to fit in with the fashions of the world. Which is really the biggest reason to quit going to church.

Read More: The Most Sincere Autobiography Ever Written