The Relationship Whore

Lindsey

Lindsey is a 24-year-old girl. Most would rate her as a 7.5, maybe an 8. She lost her virginity at the age of 17, to a serious boyfriend. Since that time, she has had four more “serious” boyfriends spanning various relationship lengths, from a few months to a couple of years. So, in seven years she has had a total of five serious boyfriends. In addition to that, she slept with three other guys as rebounds, and had two one night stands when she was drunk. She also blew a “couple” of guys when she was in Cabo on spring break in college, but she doesn’t really count that.

This puts the total number of guys she has slept with at ten.

Lindsey goes on a lot of dates, almost as if it’s a sport to her. She is hooked on OKCupid, Tinder, POF, and any other site that gives her the opportunity to meet friends. She is always eager to talk about her past relationships, whilst making it very clear to the “lucky” man sitting next to her at the bar that she “isn’t like other girls”; i.e. she doesn’t sleep around very much. She makes it clear, up front, that she is looking and ready to start a new relationship, despite her last “serious” relationship ending just months ago. She tends to get her hopes up on every date, only to be dropped off disappointed at the end of the night—disappointed that her Prince Charming was not buying her $15 Cosmo drink. He just didn’t “have it” for her, but she’ll find the right one, she rationalizes to herself.

Lindsey thinks she is a good girl, because she mostly just has sex with men whom she is in relationships with. Anytime she is alone, she feels inadequate, as if she needs someone to complete her. She very much dislikes it and longs for the compassion and comfort of a relationship.

While Lindsey does get in a lot of relationships, she is never quite sure why they end. They seem to just lose the fire and peter out; sometimes she dumps the guy, and sometimes she gets dumped. Either way, the breakups are often relatively amicable while the two partners go their separate ways.

The next week, she is out with a man from Tinder, telling him how she can’t wait to find the one.

Sarah

Sarah is also a 24-year-old girl. Most would rate her as a 7.5, maybe an 8. She lost her virginity at the age of 16, to a short-term boyfriend. Since that time, she has had two more “serious boyfriends,” both of which lasted for two years, respectively. So, in eight years she has had a total of two serious boyfriends. In between, she had seven flings/FWB situations (mostly lasting 3-6 months, and sometimes two at the same time), and three one night stands. She also blew a “couple” of guys when she was in Costa Rica on spring break in college, but she doesn’t really count that.

This puts the total number of guys she has slept with at thirteen.

Sarah rarely goes on dates, preferring to spend time with her female friends during the week and participating in her own hobbies. She had a Tinder account, but got tired of it after a few days; preferring to meet men through her social circle. When she actually does go on dates, she doesn’t go on it with any expectations. She is open about her sexual past and general sexuality, and makes it clear that she tries not to sleep around but sometimes it “just happens.” Her low expectations lead to her feeling very neutral about many dates at the end of the night—perhaps slightly excited if she liked him, but if it went poorly, she generally moves past it.

Sarah realizes that she is not a perfect angel because of her previous promiscuity. When she is alone, she feels okay about herself. She would like to meet someone whom she really clicks with, but is okay spending nights at home by herself.

While Sarah does not get in relationships often, the two she had were both passionate. Both times, there were clear differences as to why the relationships could not move further forward. Out of her two serious boyfriends, she dumped one and the other dumped her.

The next week, she is out and has a one night stand and regrets it greatly.

Who would you pick – Sarah or Lindsey?

Read More: 5 Ways To Eject From A Relationship