I’ve been in the international game for over twelve years. I even have a master’s degree in international relations. From Asia to South America, I’ve met my fair share of foreign women of different colors, ages, shapes and mindsets. I’ve been with intellectual women to those that are young and native, but beautiful. Now 33, I am with the right woman after years of shuffling through the deck. She is foreign, beautiful, sweet, feminine and caring—exactly the characteristics that so many American men yearn for. It’s no wonder that friends, co-workers, and random guys are always asking me how I did it.

It amuses me how dudes assume I have some hidden secret. I’ve been a teacher most of my life, so it isn’t my money or my looks—my love of beer definitely has me nowhere close to having a toned body. In fact, many foreign women are forgiving when it comes to financial success or looks. In reality, I don’t have any secret. I just do what I do and I haven’t met many guys that can keep up. I often see Western guys desperate to get an Asian or Latina honey, but awkwardly striking out. Many of these boneheads are even good-looking and have money, but no game to match. That is sad, but I am offering my advice because I’m tired of watching you fellows struggle. Before you make judgments about me, put your ego aside and check out my five tips for finding a quality foreign woman.

1. Behave like a man

Whether in the US or abroad, I see a lot of American men who start behaving like they were in middle school the minute they start talking to a foreign woman. I’ve witnessed this in both Asia and in Latin America. If you can’t get away with acting like a dumbass with American girls, then don’t do it with that cute Japanese or Colombian girl sitting next to you. Remember, foreign women are often attracted to American men because of our reputation for being gentlemen.

While our own American women can’t appreciate this, a foreign women certainly will. If you are in a bar, don’t put your arm around a foreign girl you don’t know or pull her hat off of her head as a joke. They get enough of this childish play from their own men, which is the reason why a lot of foreign women entertain the idea of being with an American guy in the first place. It’s good to be funny and charming, but don’t be an ass. Foreign women are beautiful, intelligent, and kind, so give them respect—more of them actually deserve it.

2. Stop playing the race card

It’s 2014, fellows. Everyone has the internet and watches American movies and shows depicting the diversity and dynamics of American culture. On average, women are generally more accepting of other races and cultures. If you are a white guy, stop playing the “angry white guy” routine. It’s a huge turn off for women. The world is changing at warp speed, so get over it or die in bitterness. A good foreign woman will appreciate an American man that is open-minded, mature, and intelligent.

The idea that Asian girls are only attracted to white guys and you need just to show up and be a “white dude” is dying hard. That might have been the case twenty years ago, but not anymore. The new global generation thinks differently and what matters now is who you are as an individual. On the other hand, if you are a brother or Latino, that whole act of hanging out in the club and being cool is getting old as well. Sure, you may be able to pull some club rats back to your crib on the weekend, but I am talking about finding a quality foreign woman that will love you like you have never been loved before. A nice foreign lady in 2014 wants to know what is inside your brain regardless of what race or ethnic background you are.

 3. Learn her language

I am not saying that you need to become completely fluent in her language, or even reach the conversational level at first. However, at least make an effort. Again, a beautiful foreign woman wants an American man who is intelligent, not a walking stereotype of the typical ignorant American. She wants to be proud to introduce you to her friends and family. Whether you start dating a Latina honey or Chinese girl, make an effort to learn even the basics of her language. Even if you only know ten or twenty words, she will appreciate the effort.

Unlike American women, foreign women often appreciate men that try. When you start learning her language, pay particular attention to the  correct pronunciation. Don’t make fun of her language or culture and definitely do not mock her English. However, if she doesn’t want you speaking her language, move on to the next girl—she’s probably only using you to learn English.

4. Learn to love her food

This is one that still boggles my mind. I meet a lot of American men so desperate for an exotic foreign lady, but extremely picky about food. This one is tied in with language and culture, since food is such an essential part of someone’s background. Unfortunately, we don’t value food in America like other cultures do. You need to realize that the nice Mexican girl or Japanese cutie you just starting dating needs her man to love her food. Not only does she want you to eat her cooking, but she also wants to be able to eat out sometimes at restaurants of her taste. A good foreign woman wants a masculine, worldy man, and not a whiny, uncultured goon. You don’t have to enjoy each item on the menu, but make some kind of effort. Trust me, you will be rewarded in the bedroom.

5. Make her laugh

This is an obvious one, since it is the secret to attracting all women. Unfortunately, Western women don’t seem to appreciate good humor like they used to. More often then not, they’d prefer to use the opportunity to put you down even when you employ quality humor. However, foreign women on average are more playful and love a man who can make them laugh. This is particularly true in parts of Asia and especially in Latin America. A nice foreign woman also likes to see you make others laugh. She wants to see that you are sociable and the kind of guy who can joke around with people and not get easily offended by what others say. Remember, people are not so PC in other parts of the world as they are in the United States.

Please feel free to comment and add any tips you think may be useful. You may not agree with what I have to say, but I am only speaking from experience. I have seen it and done it all, and I can tell you that it is a beautiful world out there. Follow my lead  and you will increase your chances of attracting a quality foreign woman.

Read More: 10 Reasons Why Foreign Women Are Better Than American Women