Reflections On My Freshman Year Of College

So my freshman year of college is over. I had a period of idiocy where I started to believe some of the ultra-left wing bullshit that American colleges try to drive into their students. As a result, I posted some things over on the RVF that I’m not proud of, and I feel as though this is a good place to apologize for it. So gents, I’m sorry that I regressed into white knighting at some points on the forum. Roosh was right to suspend my membership, and I’ve decided to take time actually doing things rather than writing about them.

My freshman year was, all in all, a formative experience. I learned more than I thought I would, and I also found that the Western world is much worse than I thought. On the other hand, I met some really great people and hooked up with a few women, eventually dating one for awhile (more on that mistake later). Overall, if this is what my first year was like, I’m eager for the next three. So without further ado, here’s what I’ve learned from my first year:

1. Most men are bums

It’s true. Most men suck. Most men can’t be forced to get off their asses and do anything. They’re completely happy with staying exactly where they are and not advancing emotionally or intellectually. I’ve lost count of the number of times that I had to take shit from guys over not following what they considered “the rules” for an interaction with women. Too many men still believe in all the typical “nice guy” bullshit that I had to forcibly unplug myself from. I don’t think I’ve mentioned this here, but my red pill awakening began when the first girl I dated tried to have me locked up. Why? Because I believed in the “nice guy” shit, that being all sweet and nice to her would result in my getting back with her. Total nonsense, and I wish that today’s me could beat some sense into 15 year old me. Despite the fact that most men suck, you’re going to meet some good guys. That brings me to the second point.

2. Although most men are bums, some aren’t

95% of guys are still plugged into the “women as a prize, I have to win her” mentality. To me, that’s the most important red pill you can take. Most men refuse to acknowledge that embracing the fact that you want to fuck her silly gets you with her. I’m not talking about direct versus indirect, because that has its own place. I’m talking about embracing your masculinity, putting your balls on the line, and making the fucking approach. So if 95% of men suck, then there’s 5% who don’t. That 5% is who you want to surround yourself with. Some of them, like me, decided to learn game. I encouraged one such guy to join me, and I found a few others who were learning on their own. These guys rapidly became my friends. Other guys who showed an ambition, a drive towards something greater also became my friends. These are guys who aren’t happy with comfort zones and refuse to stop improving. Other guys I met through my social circle. These guys become my friends because they’re (a) cool guys and (b) they often are good game models.

3. Avoid relationships

I ended up in a relationship with a nice, feminine woman for the better part of my second semester. We had a lot of sex, and she got very attached to me. I wasn’t as attached, due to having an abundance mindset. When she violated my boundaries, she knew. I liked the girl, and even after we broke up, we ended up hooking up. We both lost our virginity to the other, for the record. Anyway, I feel as though while she was a good girl, I shouldn’t have gotten into it like I did. I got into it because I was basically shamed by a guy who can’t hook up with fat chicks into dating the girl I dated. Yeah, not very “alpha,” right? Anyway, as a result of the relationship, I lost at least five opportunities. Some of my old “nice guy” mentalities took hold. I would go out with my buddies, drink and spit game. But I never went beyond number closing, which (as you guys know) doesn’t mean shit in and of itself. And then, to top that off, I never really used any of those numbers.

4. Learning game is tough, but fun

I entered college with an academic understanding of game. I knew how it worked, I had a few products, but I never had actually approached a woman and started talking to her with the intention of sleeping with her. But as soon as I got there, I jumped into game. I approached something like 15 women in two nights once, and that was what it took to get over nighttime approach anxiety. I approached four women in a row once and was blown out by all four within 30 seconds. That was probably the worst I’ve ever been in terms of game.  That night made me re-evaluate what I was doing, but all in all, I got a hell of a lot better because of it.

I quickly figured out that I was making a lot of beginner mistakes (and I probably still am), but I worked on fixing them, and I got a lot better. My body language has massively improved, and so has my tonality. I’m now trying to break into direct day game, and it’s been a hell of a lot tougher than I could’ve imagined. The state part is the worst, in my opinion, and although I no longer have approach anxiety at night, I still have it during the day. By the way, I highly recommend this article for anyone trying to break into direct day game as well.

Some of my most fun experiences have come from game. Going to a party, spitting game at some girl, and then going back to her dorm and fingerbanging her in the stairwell is something I’ll never forget. My first college make out, where I said nothing and let body language do the work, was an amazing experience. Learning game is fun. Yeah, you will have experiences that suck like getting pulled away from a girl who’s clearly into you to refill the bucket, but the victories far outweigh the defeats. Again, I’m glad I started.

5. Women can be crazy

When I broke up with the girl I was dating, my fraternity had a date party. I saw this girl I knew in the middle of the street and very calmly walked over to her. I told her about it and and she came with me. She apparently thinks game is “creepy” and we don’t talk most of the night. Yes, part of that was my fault. I got more drunk than I should’ve, but I also got cockblocked most of the night and became more aggressive than I wanted to be. This girl turned out being a crazy feminist, by the way. I take her back to her place and leave her. She offers to teach me how to get girls. I tell her that I’m not interested. She then proceeds to send me three paragraph length texts about how I’m creepy, wrong, whatever. I tell her “goodnight.” She then proceeds to send another paragraph and a half of bullshit. I delete her number. It turns out that she’s a serial monogamist and that my fraternity president (who’s what some would call a “higher beta”) had experienced the same thing. She then tried to bitch him out about not taking her, because he was with another woman. I’ve spoken about ten words to her since, and the general consensus around the fraternity is that she’s nuts.

6. Game is a hot commodity

Yes, I’m not a master at game. I’m honest about that. That being said, since I have some, I’m better off than 98% of all college guys. I lived in a hall with 16 other guys. Out of the 16 of us, four of us (including myself) fucked women. Another guy had the bag of phone numbers, but never understood that numbers mean very little in and of themselves (I learned that the hard way). And yet another guy only was able to do stuff while blacked out. He was shocked at what I told him in terms of game. That being said, game still was incredibly useful. It wasn’t just the fact that I got laid and made out with a few girls. It was the fact that my self-confidence and body language improved to the point where girls would eye fuck me when I walked down the street. It was the fact that a girl I hadn’t spoken to for 3 months would look at me with the “fuck me please” eyes. Sadly, I didn’t actually fuck her.

Conclusion

These are only a handful of the things that my freshman year taught me. I’m still working on my game, and I’m finding that the more I do wrong, the better I get. I’m looking forward to another year of college, and I plan to better myself so that I can recognize the goals I’ve set. Anything less than those goals (involving grades, women, etc.) would be a failure. And by the way, it’s good to be back.

Read More: Letter To My College Freshman Self