There was a time when going to school meant you were going to learn. A time where discipline was expected and lessons learned. I had the idea to become a teacher. I had an image in my head of men sitting in leather chairs surrounded by walls of books, smoking cigars, sipping brandy, discussing philosophy, and history among other things. To my surprise and horror the education system where learning actually takes part is a thing of the past. I am majoring in education and will graduate soon. If you have ever felt like you have too much spare money and sense of achievement lying around and need somewhere to take it than majoring in education is the perfect place for you. Our current educational system in America is

  • Almost completely taught by women
  • Heavily regulated by the government

So surprisingly it is hard for knowledge and learning to flourish and grow in a place when everything is done for emotions and an agenda.

1. The Self Esteem Nazis

“It’s not Billy’s fault that he is 200 pounds at age 12!!!” says the teacher. In my mind I think then who the hells fault is it? Doritos? The parents? Are they force feeding Billy? We had an assignment where we had to address how we would handle a kid who was fat’s self-esteem and to my shock and surprise “lose some damn weight” or maybe “don’t have the BMI of a hippopotamus” was not the “correct” answer according to my overlords—I’m sorry, I meant professors. In my evil dirty man brain I thought “Hey Billy is not doing himself any favors by being fat so maybe…I don’t know…he should lose some weight, maybe hit the gym or stop eating so damn much”. Wrong! Evil! Obviously what Billy needs it to be told he is fine the way he is because you know he is an individual of merit.

fat kid

2. Androgyny Is A Virtue

I did something horrible. Your computer will most likely explode after reading the following sentences so I apologize in advance. When addressing a group of students I said “you guys.” Let it sink in, I know I am a horrible person, no need to tell me. I had points taken off for this statement. Call me crazy but I just thought “you guys” sounded a little better than “you individuals of the multicultural and diverse non gender specific world.” Again I was probably using my damn patriarchal dinosaur brain. I just cannot imagine what it would be like (again most likely because of my dirty male brain) to be a little girl and hear the words “you guys.” I am not sure how many lives I destroyed that day but I am sorry for every one of them. It is people like me that create 200 pound 12 year olds.

3. “Protect” The Precious Children

We had an assignment where we had to state what we would say and do if a misbehaving student was assigned a “guardian” (someone to keep the kid in line). In this case the guardian was an ex-Marine assigned to a misbehaving boy we will call him Johnny. “What do you think about this?” asks the professor. I think great—smack Johnny next time he acts up I can’t reach from here. Again not the right answer. No we were supposed to take the side of poor little Johnny. You see it is not Johnny’s fault he acts up. Apparently there is some evil being out there ruining all of our kids. (You know since it is obviously not their own decisions or God forbid their fault). We should probably instigate a nationwide manhunt.

4. No Testosterone Allowed

The origin of evil, the original sin, is testosterone. Even the word makes me shudder. If kids (i.e., boys) get into a fight that they are expelled and deemed evil by the school board. Fighting is a normal part of male maturity and when you bottle it up it finds other ways to release itself. As long as no one seriously gets injured then a fight every now and then really isn’t that big of deal, especially when compared to the alternatives. However the school system in its endless effort to quell testosterone wherever it may be found declares fighting an evil. Then we wonder why so many Americans are fat and retarded, on top of being soft.

Do you remember all those school shooting that happened in the 1920’s when kids could bring guns to school (in the back of their trucks on gun racks)? Yeah, me either. Am I advocating that kids should bring guns to school? No of course not, especially not with this generation. It was different when kids had to survive with hunting and grew up with guns in rural areas. All I am saying is that maybe every now and then we could use some common sense for solving our problems.

5. Children Are King

Another assignment we did is where we had to do a presentation where we introduced ourselves to a class of virtual students. Now there were six students and each had a unique “personality”. What would happen is when we would begin our introduction one of the kids would either interrupt or one would pull out her phone. Other teachers failed the test so when I got up there I figured I would handle this like a soon to be adult should.

When the phones were pulled out I said put the thing away. I said that if she didn’t stop she could leave. Wrong answer, I failed the test. Instead I was supposed to placate and cave to the student. Why? Because I wasn’t supposed to argue with the student—I was supposed to “involve” the student. What does this mean? This means that I was supposed to ask her if she could use her phone to help look something up for me. So essentially as the teacher I wasn’t allowed to interfere with the student’s precious will. Again we wonder why American is falling and these are just my limited experience within the past two years.

bad student

Believe it or not but coddling does not produce well-adjusted individuals. Crazy, right? If you take anything from this I hope it is that self-education is the only education. Our education system is a joke and unlike most jokes this one has consequences. However, as we know a large part of being a man is being self-reliant (yet another thing the educational system deems a sin). So until next time if your ever wondering why Johnny can’t read yet think he deserves to be a billionaire you will know why.

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