Preparing Yourself

Having a wingman you can depend on makes your gaming life incredibly easier. However, before you begin searching high and low for that great wingman, you must do two things. First, you must be a good wingman yourself. To reach this level, see my fellow ROK writer’s article here. Knowing what makes a good wing can make you appreciate how amazing a benefit it is to have a high quality wing you can trust when you are out gaming. Moreover, no high quality wing wants to be with someone who can’t reciprocate.

Second, to elaborate on one of the requirements from the above-mentioned article, you should go out solo to develop and hone your own skills enough to be able to operate without the reliance of a wing. Then, not only will you be able to take the assist a wing gives you to completion, but you can also appreciate how easy it is to not have to go out solo. Don’t get me wrong, going out solo is fun and rewarding, but it is harder than having that good wing.

Finding A Good Wingman

I will not sugarcoat it and say this is easy, but it is possible with some effort. As we get older more and more of our friends drop into the LTR or marriage zone, diminishing our available pool of known gentlemen to select a good wing from.

The more difficult way is to meet them out while gaming yourself. It can happen, but I would not rely on this method. The easier way is to put yourself in a position to meet like-minded people, and see who you have some “wing chemistry” with. I’ve met a few people off the Roosh forum and while almost all of them are solid people, you tend to only click with a few for gaming purposes.

I have no problem giving credit where credit is due. Upon relocating from LA, one of the guys I met up with turned out to be a great wing and someone I was able to game easily with. On at least two occasions off the top of my head, he has been directly responsible for my success. The first we approached two girls standing on the patio of a bar, and within minutes he had my girl’s friend out of there. He didn’t end up going home with her (he went home with another girl), but he gave me enough of a window to isolate and leave with the girl I was speaking to.

And as recently as this past weekend, which I reference in the below tweet, he literally just had a girl waiting for me at a bar.  That my friends, is a good wing.

Developing The Wing Relationship

Now imagine if you take a good wing, and go out with him hundreds and hundreds of times over the course of years. That is the situation for myself and one of my buddies. We have been gaming, on and off, for 15 years. You develop almost a sixth sense of what the other one is doing, having done this so many times that it becomes second nature.

I was keeping a live journal of my Russia trip this past summer. Upon recounting a night where my buddy and I met up with one guy in Moscow, he had the following comments regarding our means of operating:

Had a really good time at the club with you guys, have to say you and your friend were working the room pretty darn well and your buddy is a really funny guy. You guys have a laid back vibe but know when to turn it up, and sort of instinctively know what each other are doing at all times out there too.

If you and your wing go out enough together, you will reach this level. You will know what the other is thinking, what he wants to do, and what you should do at any specific time. Another example — this time being my words recounting one night from the same Russia trip — also copied from the live journal I was writing:

Some new guys come up, and one of the other guys doesn’t give up on the girls. The bangable one makes eye contact with me a few times and smiles and I smile back. These girls also keep pounding shots, I saw them take 4 shots from when they first got to the bar, all after 6:30 a.m. They are hammered. I keep waiting for any opportunity that the bangable one is alone for one second so I can go in there, but these guys won’t give up.

Finally I look at my buddy who’s standing next to her, point to the bangable blonde and mouth to him “tell her to come over here” while doing the come hither motion with my finger. He understands me and immediately he taps her on the shoulder, tells her whatever and she comes over to me. Honestly sometimes I’m spoiled with such a good wing.

The girl and her friend jumped in a cab with me, but it ended in disaster after her friend vomited inside the cab. Despite the hilarious but sad ending, the fact remains that without having such a good wingman, that opportunity would not have arisen.

I realize how fortunate I am with my buddy of 15 years, but as I point out above it is possible to develop and foster a new wing relationship. In the end, a wing is not necessary by any means and there is a lot of personal development one can accomplish by going out solo. But a good wingman can do wonders to alleviate some of that effort.

Read Next: What Effort Looks Like


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