For us men, it is important to understand that women are by nature so irrational and emotional, so capricious, fickle, and flaky, that often what we perceive to be games is for them simply ordinary behavior. We are vexed because they appear needlessly evasive or unreliable. Actually, they are just being women—that is to say, quite different from us, much less logical, constant and straightforward; and if we want to succeed with them, we need to try to understand them as they are and adjust our expectations accordingly.
Of course, this is not easy to do. Few women in the Anglo world today have much to offer besides that delightful hole between their legs, so if it weren’t for the fact that we need sex, men would certainly prefer the company of their fellow men, shunning women as second-class citizens—which, after all, has been the rightful practice in most of the world throughout most of history, and among the wise ancients in particular.
The two genders are so different that they naturally spend much of life misunderstanding one another, though they don’t even know this, unable to ever escape their own particular point of view. Men interpret women through a male point of view. Women interpret men through a female point of view. And the result is a kind of general incoherence. No wonder it often happens that as they end a relationship, men and women see only what the other person did wrong: again, being unable to see how their actions are perceived by the other. This reveals a significant limitation with respect to whether people are really “together” in a relationship, and like many other difficult things in life, it shows how ultimately alone each person is, a reality that is both humorous and sad.
Take for example the well-known female shit tests
We men know that women subject us to them in order to see how we will respond. What can they get away with? Are we strong enough to check them (that is, not too nice), or do they need to find an alpha (if for nothing else, to fuck on the side)? I used to think women were always aware of what they were doing. I assumed their motives were clear to them but opaque to us, concealed as we might expect from those uncannily subtle and sneaky creatures. But age and reflection have shown me that the matter is more complicated.
No doubt women generally do know what they are doing in creating shit tests, but with women as with men, motives are often unconscious. And in the case of some shit tests, it seems women are actually just being moody, bitchy, capricious, or irrational—in short, being women, rightly called the Second Sex (denoting inferiority) until that term became unacceptable in the modern world. And though to a man’s rational analysis this behavior may seem to be a game, or a test, or whatever, there are times when it is not intended to be that—when women are merely living their usual lives of folly, caprice and confusion: so child-like, variable and illogical that analytical thought does not suffice to make sense of them.
Women do not make sense
If they are more “emotionally intelligent” than men, it is not because of superior reasoning abilities, but rather because they are so other-oriented: in the first place, as mothers and nurturers; and in the second, as beings who spend all life under the overwhelming gaze of men—so that they must develop keen powers of observation and intuition. But for all that, women do not understand themselves. The works of Montaigne, of Dostoevsky, of Nietzsche—these and other testaments to deep self-knowledge are products of the male mind, with its steady rational character.
And so, since women are endlessly confused—utterly clueless as to their real needs and motives—we find that once we give them what they want, they don’t really want it. Thus the nice guy soon becomes boring (or indeed, clingy or needy), as the cocky guy soon tags Miss Independent. “Why won’t he call me,” wonders the sad woman, and yet when men do call (or text) often or regularly, she usually becomes flaky. Women are deeply changeable and unreliable, and the only reason that they still want a strong man is that without one their lives are so lacking in direction and decisiveness that it’s a wonder they ever know whether they are coming or going. (Note: watch women closely—the more attractive the better: their very body language will frequently reveal just how half-conscious they are. I find this to be especially evident when I’m out running night game.)
What, then, should we men do here? My answers will be well-known to many red pill men and students of the manosphere. We simply cannot allow ourselves to care much about women. This is a grim reality since, after all, there are times in every straight man’s life when he needs some emotional intimacy with a woman. Still, unless you maintain a certain level of emotional unavailability, you will necessarily make yourself prey to the most unreliable thing in life: the heart of woman, particularly dangerous in our selfish and narcissistic era.
You must also be very patient. Don’t let much of women’s nonsense bother you—after all, there is no end to it! And most of the time, if you just play it cool and wait it out—as if you don’t really care about them, and if possible, doing this with wit and charm—you will likely get what you want—which is sex, of course. For precisely how to call women out, see my post “Women Have No Sense of Justice.”
Here sports furnishes a useful analogy. John Stockton—one of the greatest point guards in NBA history—was only 6’1 and 175 lbs. Yet he was known for being tough, fearless, and dirty, all while showing virtually no emotion, though quite a lot of unwavering poise. That is how men must be with women. And, deep down, they want that, though it is important here not to believe them when they say they want a “nice guy.” In truth, women themselves are vampires for the most part. But as the weaker sex—both intellectually and physically—they simply must conceal their real nature since otherwise they’d be exceedingly vulnerable.
Women are prone to misunderstanding men
I said at the beginning of this post that women often misunderstand men. Here is a common and representative example. Because we are naturally more logical and assertive than they are, it often happens that when a man is simply making a point in a direct way, a woman will take it personally. He is “attacking her,” it will be thought, or “creating a hostile work environment,” as feminists so frequently phrase it. “Why are you so mean?” she will ask. For women are extremely sensitive to tone and to the seeming emotional character of contexts and situations. Hence, where a man thinks he is simply stating his considered views on something—doing so without any kind of unmanly sugarcoating—a woman will think the matter is about her personally, even though he is only being objective, impersonal, disinterested, etc., etc. Or again, just because a point is unpleasant, she will be quick to think it is “wrong” for that reason (often in some kind of vague moral sense), thereby showing how little regard she has for truth in itself.
There’s no simple solution to this problem. I, for one, will not emasculate myself—will not be some spineless sugarcoater—so that women won’t be “offended.” Fuck the HR department. My view is, explain to women that they are wrong to be upset—the issue isn’t personal. If that doesn’t work, oh well. We live in a very touchy time, and so few people among us are even worthy of respect that a man who goes out of his way not to offend them hardly deserves to be called a man. Before you know it, we will all be dead and most of us forgotten anyway. That “hostile work environment” really doesn’t matter much in the end. You can get your living another way, and in a manly one as well.
Notwithstanding many pernicious liberal illusions, it is a terrible mistake to believe men and women are meant to live in harmony, that they are to smoothly complement one another, and that they are equal. Just as with families and good friends, a certain measure of discord is unavoidable between us. In fact, a lot is. The sex drive is so relentless, with the survival of the species itself at stake, and human beings by nature so self-interested, that not peace but war is the natural and inevitable state of affairs between the sexes. No wonder that as we age and learn better, lasting love and fulfillment come to seem like so many phantoms. The fact that the psychological relations between men and women amount more or less to warfare corresponds to the nature of the sex act itself, which, after all, is fairly violent, with the man being assertive as the woman is passive. But of course, a man who would understand such dark truths as these must first see past the liberal illusions concerning equality and fairness that obscure them.