Before I delve into this, let’s clarify terms. To me, a “peak experience” is something so powerful, so moving, such a massive paradigm shift in your worldview and relation to yourself and others that it will stick with you until your dying day. When that day comes and you reflect on your life, these are the adventures that you will remember with a smile and think to yourself, “Man, that was one of the best things I ever did for yourself.”
Because in my 26 years on this planet, that’s one of the most poignant lessons I’ve learned: the most powerful things that will happen to and for you, are the result of your own efforts. Winning a lottery may be exciting, but I doubt anyone would look back on such an event as a time when they overcame hardship, conquered the odds, and walked away with the crown in defiance of what everyone else told them was possible.
Such events happen when you tell your shitty life to go fuck itself and take all your power back from those who would seek to siphon it away from you. Here are some peak experiences, that many people can relate to, which exemplify what I’m talking about.
1. Overcoming Serious Medical Illness
When I was 16 years old, I was not a healthy guy. A doctor told me that by the time I hit 20, I would not be able to get out of bed. At 26, looking back on that conversation motivates me in a way that perhaps only guys like Lance Armstrong would understand; someone told you you were in trouble, and you were able to overcome it.
Being a perfectly healthy 26-year old is great. But it’s nothing compared to what was “supposed” to be happening at this point in my life. It is the haters and doubters who should motivate you; let the words “no” and “impossible” be your guide.
Once you’ve had such an experience, you can only laugh at anyone who dares throw such limiting words your way and you will never take other peoples’ opinions on what you can accomplish seriously, ever again.
2. Getting Clean If You’re An Addict
Alistair Crowley once wrote that he encouraged people to addict themselves to heroin just so they could have the experience of liberating themselves by getting it out of their system.
While I would certainly never encourage anyone to deliberately mess with their own health, I can say with 100% conviction as a former addict that, yes, cleaning up is an experience like no other. It is painful, mentally, physically and emotionally. You will have to scrub your inner wounds in order to heal them. But once you do the work, put yourself through the Gauntlet and come out blasting on all cylinders on the other side–I can hardly articulate how incredible it feels.
It is like a slave suddenly smashing his chains and going on to live a life he never dreamed was possible. One in which he gets to decide the course of his day, of his life, without his master dictating where and when he should go and how he should behave.
It is one of the most liberating experiences I’ve ever had, and I encourage anyone struggling with addiction to do the work necessary to free yourself from that hell.
3. Walking Away From A Hot Girl Who Loves You
Most of us have been in relationships at some point. Furthermore, many have been involved with girls who were deeply invested in us, while we could barely remember their names. Every once in a while, a woman’s hotness and desire to please you will move you in such a way that your genetic imperative to make her your baby momma will blind you to the reality that perhaps it’s not the best idea. You harness every ounce of your logic and reason, realize it’s a raw deal, and keep her at an appropriate distance.
This can be awfully difficult if she’s the kind of girl who you’ve always dreamed of carrying around on your arm, showing off at parties and to your family, rubbing in peoples’ faces what kind of girl you’re attracting these days. But then, say, she has gotten “tired of being just a fuckbuddy” and demands an upgrade. Smart men know the dangers of this trap, and will never agree to a woman’s demands. Even if we secretly desire to upgrade her, we know better than to do so on her terms as the result of an ultimatum.
At that point, you cut her loose. You tell her it’s been great, it’s been fun, but that’s not really your style. You watch with fascination as her hamster picks up speed, throwing every tool in its arsenal at you, and you stand by your frame and let her go. How hard do you think it’s going to be to hold your frame with other girls after that? The 5’s and 6’s at the bar, demanding your attention and money, will appear as cartoon characters purely there for your amusement.
However, as great as all three of those things, nothing quite tops…
4. Telling Everything And Everyone To Go Fuck Itself For A While
I mean it. Every once in a while, when you’re so stuck in a routine that life feels like Groundhog Day, Ghost. Break up with your girlfriend(s). Tell your housemates you’re leaving. Quit your job. Tell your friends you’re going to live your own life for a while.
Then travel. Don’t ask anyone else where you should go, do your own research and be reticulate in where you want to go, why you want to go, etc. Decide what you’re leaving behind, and what you’re seeking instead. Write a new story for yourself, and become whoever you’ve always wanted to be until the grind of daily life forced you to be someone else.
Then do it. Buy the ticket. Ditch your phone. Use the computer sparingly and keep communication with the outside world to a bare minimum.
You can do this for a month, a few months, or even years if you really want to and have the funding to do so (and luckily, there are plenty of awesome jobs everywhere). You will completely lose the shitty paradigms you learned in the United States, absorb better and healthier parts of other cultures, and get closer and closer to finding your true Self: the ultimate prize for a seeker in this world.
With each experience like this, one more layer of slavery is shed. One more Red Pill is taken, and you are one step closer to becoming the Man you were born to be. He’s in your blood, in your DNA, and fuck anyone trying to keep you from growing into your destiny.
Take back your power, take back your sack, and unleash yourself to the fullest extent onto the world around you. It is your playground, so go play for a while and make memories that will change and stay with you forever.