As of 2013, one can safely assume that virtually every person in Western society that does not live under a rock has a Facebook account, and most of them (myself included) are closed off to the idea of completely giving it up. While guys will usually get a girls cell phone number when they meet them from a cold approach, guys have been making the mistake of “Facebook closing” their approaches instead, which has a number of drawbacks compared to a traditional number close.
The best analogy for Facebook in relation to game is to think of it as “Friendbook”. Guys should feel free to add any dudes or unattractive girls they meet if they wish but avoid girls to Facebook that they are trying to later have sex with.
Occasionally, a girl will turn down a number close and offer you her Facebook instead. Unless a girl has a legitimate reason for why she cannot make contact with you via phone, a girl who refuses to give you her phone number is not serious about meeting up with you again. Young girls give out their phone numbers like candy to the point where the most numbers are essentially worthless.
When a girl offers her Facebook to you instead, it is like the 21st century incarnation of “Let’s Just Be Friends”, but even worse considering that she still “friendzones” most of the guys who she gives her actual number to anyway. Girls will readily give out their Facebook profiles to gain yet another orbiter to validate her by liking her constant stream of photos and statuses. Do not be that guy.
Why You Shouldn’t “Facebook Close” Girls
Something I see among young guys learning cold approach pickup is to actually ask for a girls Facebook straight off the bat without even trying for her phone number. To be frank, this is a stupid move. If you Facebook close a girl to arrange to meet up with her again later, it is guaranteed that she will go through your pictures and recent activity and use that information to reassess how attractive she thinks you are.
This is both a blessing and a curse depending on how “pimped out” your profile is, but I for one would rather play it safe and make girls use their impression of me in person to decide whether or not to meet up again rather than a Facebook profile.
Another critical reason why guys need to stop Facebook closing their cold approaches is the new “Seen by” feature on Facebook messages. This new feature allows Facebook users to know at exactly which time the person they were messaging saw their last message, which can lead to you having to put up with unnecessary drama when you decide to take your sweet time in responding to her.
Facebook Is Incompatible With The Player Lifestyle
Lastly, Facebook makes it logistically more difficult to date multiple girls at once, requiring you to delete or remove the tags of any incriminating comments, photos, statuses and check-in’s that your girls make that appear on your profile. This entire hassle and the danger of getting caught is infinitely smaller when you do not have them on Facebook. I don’t think it even needs to be said how adding girls you approach to Facebook won’t work if you are in a “Facebook official” relationship.
In a cold approach situation, I strongly advise young men against adding girls to Facebook that you’ve just met unless there is legitimate reason why she cannot communicate with you via phone. You can relax this policy post-sex and after you’ve known her a little for longer if you see no downside to doing so. It is a decision you have to make by ear.
How To Escape Giving Girls Your Facebook
If a girl you are seeing asks for your Facebook after a while and it would be a bad idea to give it to her (maybe because you have a girlfriend or you lied about your age when you met her or you just want to play it safe), tell her that you deactivated your account because you were tired of the bullshit and attention whoring on your newsfeed. Girls will nod their heads in agreement and understand exactly what you mean.
The next step you must take is to minimize the chances of your girls finding your Facebook by changing your Facebook’s privacy settings so that only people you have mutual friends with can find your profile by using Facebook’s search feature.
The rise of smartphones and social media has drastically changed the way young men and women communicate and make plans together. In a time when calling girls on the phone is rarely done outside of relationships, it is imperative that today’s young men do not let texting go the way of the dinosaur. Do not allow your Facebook profile to become a factor in your game.