My background is in fitness. Having worked with many people, I now realize the ones who succeed are the ones who learn to love the process. They begin to enjoy lifting weights, or cooking healthy meals.

The ones who fail are the ones who tell me, “I want to gain 10 pounds of muscle” or “I want to lose 20 pounds of fat” – then bitch and complain throughout the workouts, only to fall off a month or two later. They have become attached the end game, but neglect the means necessary to get there. They have it backwards.

When it comes to game, it’s no different. I have seen it in myself and through my friends. When I’m happy to be at a particular lounge or bar – I kill it. When I’m going through a stretch where I’m less than excited to be out, I tend to fare quite poorly.

Do You Look Forward To Going Out?

Friday morning. It’s the beginning of the weekend.

Are you pumped to hit the bars tonight, and run some game?  Or are you dreading the thought of going out?

It makes a difference. A huge one, at that. Obviously if you don’t want to go out, things will end up sour. Gaming has to be more than an item on the to-do list. More than another chore. It’s not something to be done on autopilot. If you don’t bring the energy, you won’t have solid approaches, fun interactions, or any bangs. But more importantly – progress will stall. You will never make it past the initial learning curve – and reach poosy paradaise – if you can’t stand going out, and meeting girls.

Or Do You Just Want To Get Laid?

Maybe you aren’t overly excited. Maybe you aren’t dreading it either. Maybe you’re just picturing a piece of fine ass you want to hit.

Yes, this is an end goal for most men in this game. But being overly attached to the outcome is dangerous. After all – having to dress up, cab it to the venue, approach a prospect, make small talk, escalate things, and get her home alone –  seems like a pretty big nuisance when all you care about is sex.


If you don’t enjoy doing everything in between points A and B – getting there is going to be a much bigger challenge. You will perform worse, and you’ll likely get bored or frustrated. It doesn’t matter how much material you’ve read on approaching, negging, escalating, etc. if all you care about is the cream. You can’t skip the intermediary steps (without hiring a hooker). And so you must find a way to enjoy them.

3 Steps To Enjoying The Process

I offer the following 3 simple steps as a means to extracting more joy out of the gaming process.

1. Choose your time – day or night? Game can pretty well be divided into 2 distinct forms. Day game and night game are different from top to bottom. Experiment with both and see which is more appealing to you. If you’re a party animal, the choice will be obvious. But for many guys, the former is more natural, albeit the road less traveled.

2. Choose your crew – wing, wings, or solo? I have a great wing. We get along well, compliment each others styles, and most importantly – always have a great time. If you go out with your friend and it all it does is make you mope around like a chump, then ditch him for a replacement or give solo dolo a try. During the day is a bit different – solo is the only way.

3. Choose your locale – nightclub, college bar, mall, coffee shop? Once you have the first two items decided, this should be a bit easier. If you’re going solo during the day, then figure out if you feel more comfortable heading to a busy mall, or hanging out at a low key coffee shop. If you’re hitting the town with a wing – a college bar might be the best spot. And going one level deeper – find a specific locale. You’ll notice that you’ll feel more comfortable, have a better time, and get better results if you get a certain bar – or mall – on lock.

Take these easy steps, and it will feel less like you’re taking shots in the dark – and more like you’ve found a new hobby that you love. And one that gets you laid.

Read More: Freestyle Rap Tightened My Game


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