Last week, I talked about the reasons women manipulate men, how to distinguish manipulation tactics from good behavior, and how to set the tone in terms of reducing the odds of your woman attempting to play mind games with you.
Today I’m going to talk about the three most common ways girls manipulate men as well as their motivations for the particular methods they key in on. More importantly, I’m going to tell you exactly what you need to say and do to shut this shit down and thwart any thoughts of a repeat attempt any time soon.
Again, these are real world examples that I have used myself with multiple females. When I do, one of two things usually happens: 1) They fall in line and keep the mind fuckery to a minimum or 2) They disappear because they know I’m not a man who can be mind fucked. Either way there is little wasted time on mind games which is the intended result.
1. Compliments and praise
The most insulting thing a woman can say to a man is “You’re such a great guy!” What she really means is that she doesn’t want to fuck you, but because she wants you to stay in her orbit she uses this tactic to which leads me to the very reason why she does in the first place…
To reinforce the behavior she wants you to engage in. By telling you you’re a “great guy” she is rewarding you with praise (which for most men is more than enough) so you will continue to take care of all of her non-sexual needs while she gets pounded out by unemployed tattooed garage band guitarist who may or may not have a permanent address.
Sometimes a woman does pay you a genuine compliment. For example, your girl might tell you “You look great in red!” which means she wants to to wear red because it makes you more attractive to her.
But whether it’s a compliment or an attempt control you, the intent is the same: to positively reinforce the behavior so that you will repeat it. Let’s take a look at a few common examples and how to correctly respond.
Her: “You’re such a good dishwasher!” or “You’re such a great cook!”
You: “Don’t get used to it…”
She’s attempting to make her chores, your chores. Maybe you are a good dishwasher and maybe you are a good cook. But these aren’t things you’re going to do on the regular and she needs to understand that very clearly.
Her: “You have such a sexy mouth! I’ll bet you give great oral!”
You: “You’ll never find out.”
If eating pussy is your thing, more power to you, but most men hate it no matter what they say out loud. At best it warms the girl up for sex, at worse you get pubes in your teeth and pussy juice in your beard. In either case, licking vagina does nothing for you as a man.
I have never lost a woman because I don’t perform cunnilingus on her…. not once. But they will cheat on men who “live for going down on a woman” in a heartbeat because it’s another form of putting pussy on a pedestal. Women adore sexually selfish men and that’s the bottom line.
Don’t give in to her feeble attempts at painting oral sex as something that will keep her around. Fuck that noise.
Her: “I love that you’re not a cheap skate.”
You: Look surprised and ask, “How do you know?”
When she tells you how she knows, chuckle, shake your head, and don’t respond. In this example, she’s trying to manipulate you into spending money on her. You’re supposed to think “OMG, she loves that I’m not a cheap skate so I’d better prove it to her over and over again!”
Example 4: A real compliment
Her: “You look good in red.”
The right response: “Thank you.”
The wrong response: “Ohhh thank you soooo much! I really wanted to impress you with this outfit and I’m sooo glad you like it!”
(Next level game response: Smirk at her and say “Prove it…”)
2. Crying and other emotional outbursts
This has been a go-to method for females for eons. They’ve been using their tears and emotions to get what they want since men began taking this nonsense seriously.
Women activate their tear ducts for a few many, many reasons but within the context of a sexual relationship (and sometimes non-sexual) it’s usually for one of two reasons: 1) To lessen the blow of you reprimanding her for bad behavior, or 2) Manipulating you into doing something she knows you don’t want to do.
Understand this immutable truth gentlemen: The only time a woman’s tears are genuine are when they are alone.
If a woman has an audience, she is crying crocodile tears every time. If anyone at all is in her presence when the tears start to flow, every one of those salty drops are lies. Maybe she’s trying to sway public opinion, maybe she’s trying to make you look bad, maybe she’s trying to convince a crowd that she’s right and you’re wrong, maybe she’s trying to get something from you. Whatever the case may be, when a woman has an audience whether it’s one person (likely you) or 21 people, there is always an ulterior motive. Always.
So how do you handle a woman attempting to manipulate you with tears? Let’s take a two examples:
Example 1 – Lessening the blow of verbal reprimand
When you tell her she was overly talkative to the waiter at the restaurant when she knows damn well she’s not to talk to men in public unless she has explicit permission from you, she’ll start to cry because she wants you to back off of your principles and loosen the boundaries you’ve set for her. She wants you to be okay with her having “innocent or innocuous” conversations with other men in your presence.
Proper response: When you see her eyes well up and her chin trembling simply stop talking, hand her a tissue and say “Let me know when you’re finished,” and do so with a stone face and statuesque stoicism. Show ZERO emotion and ZERO empathy.
Example 2 – She wants something
She asks you to do something (or for something), you tell her no, and then she starts crying because she wants you to believe it’s so important to her she’s willing to cry about it. Obviously she’s also doing this to get you to give her what she wants.
Proper response: “You can cry all you want, the answer is still no.” And deliver the shiv in the same stone faced stoic manner as in the first example.
Do not allow women to manipulate you with their tears. They do it to their parents, their siblings, their friends, their bosses, their boyfriends, their husbands, and everyone else. You are going to be the one man who doesn’t fall for this bullshit and when you show her that you aren’t, she will respect and love you for it.
Women want men they cannot manipulate. But they have to try because it’s what they do. When it happens, don’t respond emotionally. Respond with frankness, stoicism, and borderline cold-bloodedness. Show her that her tears are invisible to you.
If you give in and take your foot off the gas with regards to reprimanding her bad behavior or give in and do whatever it is she asked you to do because she cried or threw a fit, she’s going to be doing a lot of crying and tantrum throwing. Men like this always wonder why people describe their women as drama queens.
Sex is by far and away the number one tool women use to manipulate men. It doesn’t even have to be sexual intercourse. It could be sexual allure, the false promise of sex, the false promise of a sexual relationship (read: the friend zone), the list is endless.
Girls use their sexuality for everything from free drinks at the club to promotions at work to avoiding responsibility in any and all situations. But the time they use it the most is with their men.
Here’s another iron-clad truth: sex is transactional for women.
Don’t get me wrong, they fuck for pleasure just like we do. Sure, women use their vaginas to control men but that doesn’t mean they don’t like having sex too. But their pleasure is not the priority. There’s always another purpose for them opening their legs for a man. Even if she’s in heat and can’t wait for you to you pound the life out of her, she still knows in the back of her mind what her end game is. It’s like walking onto a car lot with $20,000, knowing exactly what car you want, but still negotiating for a better price.
As men, we fuck to fuck. We fuck for pleasure. We fuck because we wanna fuck and it feels great. Simple math. But women never fuck only for pleasure. Your girl may love having sex with you but that doesn’t mean that’s the only reason she lets you fuck her. In her mind she knows that if she lets you fuck her on the regular, you’re much more likely to stick around. Guess what guys, this is transactional: I let him fuck me, he stays with me. Sequence, consequence. Cost, benefit.
But most of the time the transaction far outweighs the pleasure for women, and there are 4 main ways women use sex to manipulate and subsequently control you.
Frequent sex in the beginning
In the beginning of a relationship, the sex is always great. You’re fucking her 2 or 3 times a day, she’s sucking your dick all the time, you’re going back door, she does it all. Girls do this in the beginning because they actually want to. A shiny new cock is something girls love playing with. It’s like a new toy. They wanna play with it all the time.
But eventually they attempt to parlay that great sex into what they think is equity. They subconsciously think “Well I sucked his cock 30 times when we first got together so he’ll treat me well even if I stop,” and most of the time they’re absolutely right, but not because of the “equity.” It’s because dudes are thirsty. The frequent sex stops and now he thinks he has to take her to dinner to get any pussy. He got used to fucking her all the time which is exactly what she wanted.
At this point, she knows she doesn’t really have to do anything to keep him around. Not even fuck him. She’ll flip the script and start withholding sex from him until he does things for her, buys things for her, etc. She’s no longer on her best behavior unless he does what she wants. Then if he’s lucky, he gets unenthusiastic starfish sex and he thanks his lucky stars when he gets even that.
Blow jobs and anal
Blow jobs and anal sex is where women really turn up the heat. She gave you a taste in the beginning but then she cuts it off almost instantly to give you that scarcity mentality meaning you’re willing to do whatever it takes to get it back.
Head and butt sex used to come freely and easily to you. She used to get on her knees and pull down your pants as soon as you walk in the door but if you want that treatment now, you’ve got to take her to an expensive restaurant and drop $200.
Back in the day she used to beg you to butt fuck her but because you haven’t gone back door in months she knows she can use anal sex to get something out of you like the new iPhone or making a car payment for her.
To punish you
Now we’re into the realm of withholding sex to “teach you a lesson.” Girls do this shit all the time. Especially when she’s trying to change your rules or your fundamentals. For example, if you catch her texting her ex, you tell that if she continues, you’re out the door. (This is not an ultimatum, this is a choice. She can stop texting the ex and keep you, or she can continue to text the ex and lose you).
Anyway, she’ll stop texting her ex (or give you the impression that she has), but then she’ll stop fucking you. She’ll act pissed off because she doesn’t want to stop texting her ex and she thinks that by withholding sex, you’ll cave and allow her to on the assumption she’ll open her legs again.
Girls also withhold sex when their men make a decision she doesn’t agree with and stops giving him pussy until he changes his mind. They withhold sex when you do something she doesn’t like to teach you a lesson to not do it again. For example, if you work on a project for 2 hours longer than you told her you would, she’ll stop having sex with you to teach you never to do that or anything else again.
To reward you
Girls also use sex to reward you. They do this subconsciously and here’s how it works: she’ll fuck you all day and all night in the beginning, then she’ll throttle the frequency, and then she’ll suddenly stop. Most men will never call their women out if she doesn’t wanna fuck. If you walk up behind her grab her tits and bite her neck (my personal go-to move to let a woman know I wanna fuck), and she pulls away, 99.9% of men won’t say anything about it.
They’ll shrug their collective shoulders and say something to this effect: “Okay babe, I understand you’re not in the mood,” rather than doing what they want to do by saying “What the fuck? You’re pullin’ this shit now? You’re pullin’ this ‘I’m not in the mood’ bullshit now?? You’re one of those??”
If you do what most men do and not call her out on it, she’ll keep withholding sex from you until you crack and buy her something or do something for her. Then she’s got you where she wants you. You’re a trained monkey she can extract things out of by taking away your bananas and only giving them back to you when you buy her shit. At this point, the man is trained to pay for the pussy with his money, his time, and his resources and it’s all downhill from there.
“Okay Donovan we get it. But what do you do when a woman withholds sex from you?”
So you walk up behind her, grab her tits, and bite her neck to let her know you wanna fuck or however you let a woman know it’s time to do the dirty deed. She pulls away, tells you she’s “not in the mood”, she’s got a headache, or whatever excuse she comes up with not to drop the panties.
There is only one way to handle this effectively to ensure that it will never happen again: You grab your shit leave without a word. If she’s at your place, tell her to leave.
Don’t argue, don’t converse, don’t do anything but remove yourself from the situation. This lets her know that if she doesn’t uphold her end of the bargain (sex), then you won’t uphold yours (attention, company, companionship, etc.)
Her: “Where are you going?!”
Her: “So this is just about sex for you?!”
Her: “OMG this is soooo over!”
Her: “Okay, okay I get it. Let’s have sex.”
No matter what she says, asks, or does, do not utter a single word to her. Even if she throws the pussy at you (because regardless of what she says, she knows why you’re leaving) do not turn back. Leave.
If you’re kicking her out of your place, use the same protocol. And make sure you’re leaving your place too. Doesn’t matter where you go, just leave. She’ll have to leave too.
Not only have you shown her that sex is a requirement for your company, you’ve also activated dread. She has no idea where you’re going and because she knows you’re leaving because she didn’t put out, her imagination will start to run wild and get the better of her.
The night you leave (or kick her out), do not answer her calls or texts. Trust me when I tell you that she will blow up your phone with calls, texts calling you an asshole, telling you she loves you, telling you she hates you, pictures of her tits, and so forth. She’ll be all over the map which is exactly where you want her. DO NOT RESPOND TO ANYTHING THAT NIGHT. Make her sweat it out.
After that, run standard dread game for the next couple of days or so. Not extreme dread game when you go radio silent for a week. You want to keep her in your orbit after all and if she thinks you’ve moved on, she will fuck another guy… guaranteed.
Instead, text her maybe four times the entire day with short, cold, responses like “Okay”, “Sure”, “Cool” etc., not answering the phone when she calls, and denying her the ability to physically see you or hear your voice for the next 48 hours.
During that time she’ll offer up her pussy on a platter. If she texts “Hey can I come over tonight?” or “Do you wanna come over tonight?” Respond with “Nah, I’m busy” or something to that effect. Do not fuck her during the 48 hour dick detention period.
Then at the end of Day 2, send her a text that says “We need to talk.” Then give her a time that SHE will come over which will send shock waves through her body and mind because she’s assuming you want to end things. No matter what she says in response, DO NOT RESPOND.
When she does come over and she asks what this is about tell her, “Nevermind, it wasn’t important” and continue on as though nothing happened. Gentlemen, she will never deny you sex again for any reason.
Headache? Nope. “Not in the mood?” Nope. Long day at work? Nope. If you want to fuck, she’s going to let you fuck her because she doesn’t want to feel like she felt for the last few days. In addition she won’t use sex to punish you, reward you, or control you. And you’ll be surprised at how quickly she offers up her mouth and anus again.
NOTE: For good measure, you will not go to her place for at least two weeks. She needs to be on your territory.
I have used this technique many, many times. Half the time they fall in line, half the time they disappear. But guess what? None of them ever denied me sex again.
The bottom line here, gentlemen is that if she denies you sex, you deny her your company and attention. If she doesn’t uphold her end of the bargain, then you will not uphold yours. This doesn’t need to be said out loud to her. Your actions will do the talking and she will read you loud and clear.
Find out why Donovan thinks your girlfriend is a slut and why you should treat her like an alcoholic here. Watch Donovan Sharpe drop Red Pill truth on TSR: Primetime Sunday through Thursday evenings at 7EST/4PST
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