5 Game Lessons From Barney Stinson
By Law Dogger
A few years ago, How I Met Your Mother was a great comedy with a great set of characters. Now it just sucks. But arguably its greatest character has delivered some excellent advice through the years. Despite being housed in fiction, Stinson had numerous quotes, ideas, and tactics that apply to modern game, which is ironic given the fact that the character is portrayed by an openly gay actor. Nonetheless, here are 5 of these that all men should follow:
5. “The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she’s 17 years, 11 months old.”
There are a few parts to this brilliant quote. First, let’s keep it legal folks. Second, it alludes to the value of youth in women, something that cannot and should not be overlooked. Finally and most importantly, you should never wait an extra day for sex, much less a month. What I mean by this is that when you are out with a girl, or when meeting a girl at a club or bar, ALWAYS go for sex that night. No bang? Blowjob. No blowjob? Handjob/fingering (then go for bang again). No hands play? Tittie play. No tits? Groping and makeouts. No groping and makeouts? THEN go for the number. This is more applicable to night time than day, but always remember you can only get what you ask for. So ask for them to accept your penis first.
Sometimes the first meeting will not pan out, so on the first date you should also go for the bang. “Women sometimes forgive a man who presses an opportunity, but never a man who misses one.” — Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord. In other words, never wait longer than you absolutely must for sex. Girls will never punish you for trying for sex, yet will punish you for being a pussy and not trying.
4. “When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.”
Nobody wants to be around a guy who is always down and in a foul mood. Girls are emotional creatures and they thrive on “feeling.” Definitely know that if you are moping around and feeling bad for yourself then no girl will want to be around you. Moreover, it ties into your confidence levels too. If you are sad and down in the dumps, you simply cannot come across as that confident man a girl is attracted to. On the contrary, being upbeat, awesome, and in a great mood will draw people to you…including women. No life of the party is ever sitting in the corner with a frown or emo gaze.
3. “The point is, marriage is stupid. Every day new 22-year olds go into bars…”
We are all now aware of the vast issues and negatives associated with marriage, especially in the Western world. Some people end up getting married because of the lack of abundance mentality. The man will think that either a) he will never find another girl as great as the one he has, or even worse, b) no girl will want to marry him other than this one. Bullshit. Step outside your door and you will run into hundreds of girls. Every day thousands of girls in your city turn 18, turn 21, enroll in college, join a gym, go to the grocery store, get coffee, etc. There is no shortage of girls in this world.
2. Have you met Ted?
Watch the above clip. Sometimes we get caught up with what we want to say to a girl upon approaching her when it really doesn’t matter. Sure, don’t go there and blurt out “nice hair, mind if I slip my dick inside?” But even a simple “Hi” is sufficient. Currently I’ve started waving to girls at bars and smiling. If they wave back, there is interest. If not, there is not. Simple, yet effective. My friend and I have actually tried the “have you met ___?” It works great. The point is just go and approach, don’t overthink things.
1. “Suit Up”
I’m a huge advocate of suiting up when going out. It shows status, power, money, confidence, style, and so on. You feel more confident in a suit. You stand out in a suit in certain venues where everyone else is wearing the standard jeans and button down shirt. I’ve had more success with girls wearing a suit (alternatively, a blazer) than all my other outfits combined. Next time you go out to a night club, put on a suit, tie, and pocket square. Take only suits with you next time you go to Vegas. Even better, do it in Eastern Europe and watch girls’ eyes light up as she stares you up and down, fidgets in her tiny dress and inquires “you are boss?”
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