The following is a sponsored article from Girls Chase.
Chase Amante checking in again. We’re going to take a bit of a diversion from our regularly scheduled promotional activities to dispel a musty old chestnut today instead.
In some parts of the manosphere, there is a belief that “game” doesn’t work. It used to be that these guys would tell you it didn’t work at all. Nowadays they use a more nuanced argument: it DID used to work, ten years ago. It’s just that NOW it doesn’t work (anymore). That was a comment in the comment section on my last article… and while I appreciate a bunch of people called that commentator out, I want to address this position directly.
The idea you can learn to socialize and become better with people through experience rubs some guys really wrong. Some of these men have never approached anything as a skill set. The idea of skill building in general offends their “just be yourself” sensibilities. It can also be that these are men who have developed specific non-social skills… and it makes them feel small to see men who’ve ignored those skills zip around them with girls.
When you’ve plowed a ton of time into cash, or muscles, or social status, and some guy without any of that gets the girl you wanted instead, it hurts. It can also be that some of these men have sworn off women completely. These men would like you to do the same. The only way women will learn to be more pliant, they’ll tell you, is for men to boycott them en masse.
Whether a guy is a “just be yourself”er or he’s a “muscles/money/status are all you need”er or he’s a MGTOW, the end result is the same: he thinks it’s a waste of time to learn to socialize. Which, of course, as you might guess, I’m going to tell you is wholly and completely ridiculous.
You Want The Results, You Build The Skill
Want big muscles? You learn how to lift. You learn how to feed yourself. You learn how often to hit the gym versus how often to rest. The biggest guys are also the biggest EXPERTS on bodybuilding… find one big guy who can’t write you an encyclopedia on feeding and resting and lifting and I’ll bet you he uses synthol.
Much of this knowledge you pick up as you go. But you do pick it up – because you’re interested in it, because you want to excel at it, because you focus on it. You study it, you talk to others who study it, you experiment, you implement. You adjust. You tweak. Your body is your own personal laboratory.
So it is in business. If you want to make a lot of money running a business, you’ve got to be an expert on running businesses. This takes endless study and implementation. You have to learn marketing. You have to learn hiring. You have to learn firing (its own unique skill set). You have to learn customer retention. You have to learn product construction. You have to learn how to advertise, because if you can’t advertise your business will always be limited to the capriciousness of what’s popular now and what isn’t. You have to learn to make things convert. You have to learn taxes (bloody taxes) and what you are legally allowed or not allowed to say, sell, and do.
Even if all you want is a lifestyle business (where you make just enough to pay the bills, then spend the rest of the day on the beach), you will still have to learn much of this. Not as much as the guy who aspires to a penthouse full of cash and a huge reach in the market, but you’re going to have to study, and you’re going to have to work. There is no four hour workweek – unless you’re on food stamps.
Just like it is with muscles, just like it is with business, it is this way with socialization. If a guy wants to tell you you do NOT need to learn how to socialize, yet still reap all the results you want, he is not your friend. He’s at best misguided; at worst, he’s a saboteur.
The successful socializer knows how to bond with people. He knows how to approach new people. He knows how to flirt. He knows how to crack jokes. He knows the right times to touch other people and where and how to touch them. He knows how to take the lead, and when to back off. He knows how to deal with other men trying to tool him or steal his girl. He knows how to go on offense and pluck away a woman he wants whom other guys want too. He knows how to turn around situations that have gone belly up. He knows how to find out all sorts of things from other people, so he knows whom he’s dealing with and isn’t getting conned. He knows how to invite the women he wants onto dates, to his place, and into bed. He knows how to make a move, and what to do when he encounters resistance. And he knows how to keep women coming back to him again and again, in love with him, devoted to him.
Like muscles, and like business, this is a skill set. It is a DEEP skill set, and it is NOT a casual skill set. You are born with social instincts – but so is every other man. And when you wade into the social arena, you wade into a competition with every other man out there.
Some of those men have muscles or money, but don’t know how to use them. Those men are not a threat to you. A few of them have these things, AND have well developed social skills. These are men you need to watch out for.
Of course, social success depends on two parts. It is one part your fundamentals – that’s your appearance, your mannerisms, your movement speed, voice, hairstyle, fashion, physique, nonverbals. And the other part of it is “game”… that is, what you KNOW how to do: all those things we just talked about successful socializers being able to do.
If you don’t know how to do these things, you are the fat guy at the gym who figures maybe he’ll try the bench press and get jacked. Or you are the impoverished guy with a website who thinks maybe he’ll write a few blog posts and throw on some Google AdSense. You’ve gotta start somewhere, but if a guy never gets more serious than this, his game (be that gym game, money game, or girl game) will never get off the ground.
If you want some science though, here it is: a study of New York state college students found, as we might guess, that the better a guy knows how to successfully navigate mating interactions, the more often he gets laid.
Surprising? It shouldn’t be. You’d think it’d be common sense, right?
If you want to be GOOD at something (like getting a hot girlfriend, or getting laid a lot more regularly), you’d think you’d want to STUDY that thing and PRACTICE that thing, right?
Get Part 3 Of My Dating And Attraction Model
I was going to write about compliance this time, and tell you how to get girls to invest more in you. Because what a lot of guys do is spend a lot of time trying to invest in women themselves… which is very nice, and women appreciate it, but it doesn’t turn them on.
Instead, this became a discussion on whether “game” still works or is out-dated or what. Which is really very silly – we’re a social species. Learning the underlying principles of sound socialization will not go out of fashion anytime soon.
Video #3 of my series of One Date videos is now out. In this video, I introduce you to the third part of the SAC formula – a science-based, and extremely thoroughly tested, TIMELESS way to suss out what a girl needs from you to end up in your bed and as your girlfriend. This is the model every successful Casanova caveman from 20,000 years ago intuitively learned, and that every guy who gets the girl he wants TODAY either figures out or stumbles on by accident. What were care about are the underlying principles here. How you use it, I leave up to you.
Give it a watch, let’s get you plugged into SAC, and let’s dial your mating intelligence up a bit (or more than a bit)… so you can be one of the guys who gets laid more, and with more of the women he wants, too. Click the image below…
And in a few more days, I’ll get one final article for you up, right here at ROK.