In the spring of 2016, I felt absolutely great. I was preparing for a fitness show a few weeks later and my body fat was around 9%. That whole spring period had been predominantly good in terms of how I felt on the inside and how I expressed my feelings and behaviors on the outside, and single dating went very well.

I mainly worked with online game as a starting point, but since I hate to spend too much time on those local websites I used my five absolute best photos from traveling, fitness modeling, and casual settings, and a brief but interesting profile text so that I could actually get girls around 6-8 to meet me not too far after. Here is how I operate when going on a first date via the internet.

Phase one: showing value and making her feel comfortable

Once you have set up a date it’s important to show value and make her feel comfortable. That is why a nice cafe is a great place to start with. You cannot expect to have sex on the first date anyway so have a more platonic, friendly, and non-sexual introduction. Therefore I chose one such in the Old Town of Stockholm. Initially you just show that you are perfectly normal and talk about yours and hers life.

Moreover, you should look as good as on your pictures. Don’t put up fitness photos if you are clearly “off-season” and have a semi-chubby face. Be on point, that’s one of the prices we have to pay to get the more attractive girls. Secondly, you should probably dress better than her, especially if you have a disadvantage like being short. There are several levels of this, of course, but I wore dress shoes, dress pants, and a navy blue coat which were not exaggerated but gave the signals that I have higher value. Thirdly, I have a better job.

All of this make her feel that you are interesting and a potential relationship or at least sex partner. It could be that she has equal or higher value than you in terms of dress style and career, but then you just hope that some other factor can be to your advantage.

Fortunately, many girls, like this one, dress rather casually and work with semi-skilled or unskilled professions. If you have seen much of the world, while she hasn’t, that’s another icing on the cake. If she says that she wants to go to Venice some time in her life, then tease her about it and say that if she is nice you might consider bringing her with you. You plant a seed in her mind, but are not too serious about it.

Phase two: escalating by going to a “romantic” place

Secondly, you should probably already on the first date move to some location that likewise are public and make her feel comfortable, but has more of a romantic vibe and enables to kiss her if you make it that far. It could either be selected spontaneously or be pre-planned.

I took her to an area near the water where lots of people walk and sit. Continue with the conversation, don’t sit too close, but gradually try to find ways to make her feel more interested in terms of subject of discussion, paired with a less friendly and more sensual vibe. Obviously this is mutual and you cannot force attraction, but the strategy is important. Don’t be stuck in the platonic vibe and topics for too long, especially if she seems rather modern and liberal. Within about six hours she wants some fun.

What I did in this case was that when she talked about that she had been stalked by two guys (she was 28 and in the slutty dating phase after a four-year relationship that had ended a couple of months earlier), I stressed that it had happened to me as well not so long ago. This made her feel that my value was high, since girls are literally chasing me, and we also had something in common. I didn’t lie but if you want to do so I can recommend using this as a means to appear more interesting. It’s like a gender reversal of #metoo.

Maybe one or two hours later we were kissing, and before we left each other we had sat up a second preliminary date.

Phase three: meet at her or your place and seal the deal

Once you have moved passed these two initial phases, it should be relatively easy to seal the deal. This usually happens on the second or third date in promiscuous countries like USA, Canada, or Sweden. You have already shown that you are interesting and look good. Now you can just talk for 30 minutes and watch Netflix.

Before even half of the movie is finished you are embracing her and not long after you should have sealed the deal, smirking and feeling good about yourself for a while.

That is a feeling that you never can get from jerking off to porn or buying a prostitute. Dating requires effort and transcends the joy one gets from the intercourse. It’s not something that you want to do always and forever, but it’s something that you likely have to do if you want to avoid being an incel. And this is one solid way of doing it.

Regardless of you have online game as a starting point or not, show real value, make her feel comfortable, and escalate with gradual shifts from platonic to romantic locations and interactions.

For more of William Adams’ material, check out his website Syncretic Politics.

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