One of the many reasons that guys avoid night game is that they are tired after a hard day’s work. While this makes absolute sense it should be understood that fatigue is not in itself a barrier to creating attraction and getting laid with hot girls. In fact, it can sometimes actually help your cause.
The key to all game, and night game in particular, is not caring too much. To put it crudely, the more you care, the less likely you are to get laid. Why? Because when you actually give a damn what happens with a particular interaction, you unconsciously telegraph this to the girl, who will then view you as needy or desperate.
Another key challenge with night game is timing. If you meet a girl that you have great chemistry with too early on in the evening then it can be a boost to your confidence. You might get a little excited, thinking that your work is almost done. In fact you now have a problem: do you stick to this girl like glue for the rest of the night and risk looking like a chode without any other options; or do you leave her, telling her you guys will meet up again later, and risk her getting pulled by some other guy in the meantime?
There’s no definitive answer. Of course, you can try to pull her out of the club there and then, but often this won’t fly as she may be with friends, or she’s paid a cover charge and wants to see a particular DJ or whatever. You can try taking her to the bathrooms, but again that won’t always work.
In the end, the best way around this is to chat to girls casually throughout the night, but to only fix on a particular target towards the end when you will both likely be leaving before too long anyway. That way the attraction will be at its height right at the moment when it’s hometime. Then your casual suggestion of “how about we share a taxi” will likely go down a lot better than had you tried it earlier.
This is where tiredness can play in your favour, because if you are at your least needy right at the very same moment when she is most ready to be pulled then it’s much more likely that you’re going to achieve the result you want.
A Night Out In Berlin
When you go out to do night game then your evening will go through a number of predictable phases. Here’s how it was for me when I visited a spot in Berlin the other night.
When I first arrive at the club it’s likely I’ll be a little socially inhibited. Certainly that was the case in Berlin. I hadn’t been out for a while and I hadn’t even been doing much day game (which will really help your nighttime interactions by the way), so I was rusty.
To overcome this I decided to walk around and just say ‘hello’ to all girls that came into my path. Nothing more or less, just ‘hello.’
At first my voice was quiet and I didn’t get a great deal of traction. But as I wandered around and spoke to more and more people (including a few of the guys), and as the music started to build in the background, I found myself relaxing and gaining in confidence.
Now my interactions with girls lasted longer. I progressed from just saying hello to introducing myself, and then spieling off my usual crap: “You look dangerous”, “My mum warned me about girls like you”, “I’m just an innocent English gentleman”, and so on. Generally accusing them of being sexual predators looking to devour me.
The thing about night game is that it doesn’t really matter too much what you say as long as (a) it’s not deep or serious, (b) it’s teasing and funny and (c) you are careful to always lead the interaction in a sexual direction.
My strategy worked. I got a lot of IOIs from girls, some longer interactions and a few makeouts (including with one very cute Austrian girl wearing just red lingerie. Don’t ask—this is Berlin we’re talking about).
The Magic Sweet Spot
From there, as the night progressed, two things were happening. First, my confidence was growing all the time as a result of the positive feedback I was getting. Second, as I became more tired I was less concerned with what I said, filtered myself less and just said the first thing that came into my head when I spoke to a girl.
This is the magic sweet spot that you want to get to on a night out in a club. It’s hard to describe precisely, but basically you should feel completely at one with the craziness of your surroundings: you should feel entirely comfortable with allowing that same craziness to infuse your own behaviour and interactions.
You should also be outcome-independent. You don’t care whether you get the girl or not because you’d just as happily go home and sleep. As such you really don’t give a damn what you say to her. It doesn’t even have to make sense.
And when you think about it, this mirrors precisely the default setting of the alpha douchebag who has infinite options. He doesn’t give a damn whether he gets the girl or not. And he doesn’t filter himself when he talks to her.
Remember: all success in game comes about as a result of non-neediness. All failure in game comes about as a result of too much concern about the outcome.
At the end of my night in Berlin I got talking to another cute Austrian girl. By now I was out of my mind with tiredness and I really didn’t give a shit.
“Why do you travel to Berlin so often?” she asked me.
“It’s . . . I dunno, it’s complicated”, I said. I didn’t have the mental capacity or inclination to think up anything cocky-funny.
“Then sort it out,” she said. And then she leaned forward, grabbed me by the neck and started making out with me.
‘Tight game’ and clever conversation have their place, but they can also look try-hard. The counterintuitive truth is that in a nightclub environment tiredness, not giving a damn and semi-literate utterances can work wonders in getting you laid with hot girls.
For a compilation of all Troy’s best game writing, advice and techniques from the last four years buy his new book How To Get Hot Girls Into Bed